Van Gogh Puns
1. I heard Van Gogh recently got into gardening. People say he has quite the green ear.
2. Did you hear about Van Gogh’s new exhibit on floral arrangements? Critics say it’s breathtaking bou-ket.
3. I asked Van Gogh if he wanted to hear a joke about impressionist art. He said, “I’m claude, monet.”
4. Why was Van Gogh such a positive person? Because he always saw the bright sunflowers.
5. Van Gogh walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bartender asked, “Gin?” Van Gogh replied, “No, just tonic.”
6. Did you hear about Van Gogh’s brief stint as a baker? His specialty was ear bread.
7. I heard Van Gogh is thinking of taking up power washing as a side job. He’d be great at cleaning ear wax.
8. What did Van Gogh say when he tripped over a chair? “Ear-whoops!”
9. Why did Van Gogh make such a great sailor? He was outstanding in his field.
10. I asked Van Gogh to DJ at my party, but he said he couldn’t. I guess he’s just not ear responsible.
Van Gogh One-Liners
11. Van Gogh? More like Van Gone!
12. What do you call an explosive painter? Van Kaboom!
13. Van Gogh? I think you mean Van Dough – his paintings cost millions!
14. Van Gogh was quite the character. Too bad he lost his head in the end.
15. They say Van Gogh was a brilliant artist. I guess you could call him a smarty pants.
16. Van Gogh? He sounds like a real ear-responsible guy to me.
17. What do you call a depressed painter? Van Woe-is-me.
18. Van Gogh? More like Van Go Away with those crazy paintings!
19. Van Gogh wasn’t very handy. Seems like he was all ears and no fingers.
20. What do you call a painter with mental health issues? Van In-sane.
Best Van Gogh Jokes
21. Van Gogh walks into a bar and orders a drink. “I’ll have a shot of absinthe,” he says to the bartender. The bartender prepares the drink and hands it to Van Gogh. After taking a sip, Van Gogh remarks, “This is oil right, but I paint it could be better.”
22. Why did Van Gogh become a painter? Because he didn’t have enough easel income.
23. Van Gogh’s doctor said to him, “I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is your ear is healing very well. The bad news is you’re still Van Gogh.”
24. What did one of Van Gogh’s paintings say to the other? “I feel like I’m being framed!”
25. Van Gogh wanted to grow a beard but couldn’t seem to manage it. He only had a little bit of stubble. His friend asked him, “What’s wrong?” Van Gogh replied, “I’m having a hard time Gogh-teeing a full beard.”
26. Van Gogh walks into an art gallery and asks if they’d display his latest painting, Sunflowers in a Vase. The owner takes one look and says, “Thanks, but no Van Gogh.”
27. Why did Van Gogh become a painter? He didn’t have any other brushes with fame.
28. What did one of Van Gogh’s paintings say to the other during an earthquake? “Hold on, I’m having a frame shake!”
29. Van Gogh’s doctor told him, “Your condition seems to have worsened. I suggest you earase all stress from your life.”
30. Did you hear about the new Van Gogh biography? Critics say it offers great insight into his eara.
31. Why did Van Gogh avoid painting family portraits? He didn’t want to make any easel enemies.
32. What did Van Gogh say when someone stepped on his foot? “Ear-ouch!”
33. Why was Van Gogh so productive as an artist? He made every day count.
34. I thought Van Gogh’s paintings were messy until I saw his room. Now I know where he got his strokes of genius.
35. What instrument did Van Gogh play? The easelio.
36. Why did Van Gogh make such a good gardener? He had a real green thumb.
37. What’s red, swirly, and currently on display at the Van Gogh museum? A strawbrerry.
38. Did you hear about Van Gogh’s brief attempt as a personal trainer? He just didn’t have the earobics for it.
39. What kind of art did Van Gogh create during his punk phase? Ear-ock.
40. Why did Van Gogh excel at painting nature scenes? He really knew how to brusher strokes.
41. I asked Van Gogh what his favorite holiday was. He said it was Earas-ter of course.
42. Why did Van Gogh make a great spy? Because he kept an ear out for everything.
43. What do you call a painter who only uses their left hand? Van Go-oh wait never mind.
44. Why did Van Gogh make such a great baker? He kneaded the dough.
45. Why did Van Gogh paint so many self-portraits? I guess he was just being easel-fish.
46. What was Van Gogh’s favorite hobby besides painting? Star ear-gazing.
47. Why couldn’t Van Gogh ever seem to open jars? He always kept cutting his ear fingers off.
48. How did Van Gogh’s family save money on haircuts? They just took matters into their own hands.
49. What was Van Gogh’s least favorite food? Macaron-ear.
50. Why was Van Gogh so good at thinking outside the box? Because he never had all his marbles.
51. What did Van Gogh say when he saw the bill for his ear surgery? “This cost me an arm and an ear!”
