February Puns (10)
1. I heard February started dating March. I guess you could say they really hit it off!
2. February may be the shortest month, but it’s still fanta-stick.
3. What did one groundhog say to the other on February 2nd? Let’s make like a tree and leaf this hole!
4. February is sweeter than a box of chocolates. It’s the sweetest month of the year!
5. February is such a bore, it really drags a-long.
6. I ordered a Groundhog Day cake, but the bakery keeps delivering it over and over.
7. What do you call two groundhogs who see their shadows? A pair o’ docs!
8. Why can’t Elsa from Frozen make it snow in February? Because it’s Anna’s month to shine!
9. What did the groundhog say when he emerged from his burrow? Time to break out my favorite flannel shirt!
10. February may be short, but it’s the perfect month for sweethearts.
February One-Liners (10)
11. I wanted to make a Valentine’s Day joke, but none of them worked out.
12. I bought my sweetheart a box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day, but I ended up eating them all myself.
13. Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers and the 3rd one’s for you.
14. They say February is for lovers, but I’ll be spending it with pizza and Netflix.
15. Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate!
16. I asked my crush out for Valentine’s Day. They said yes, April Fools!
17. Roses are red, violets are blue, Valentine’s Day is consumerist, now where’s my booze?
18. Valentine’s Day is coming up, time to lower my expectations!
19. I used to be a romantic, but February changed all that.
20. February 14th: Reminder to buy discounted chocolate the next day.
Best February Jokes (11)
21. What did the boy squirrel say to the girl squirrel on Valentine’s Day? I’m nuts about you!
22. Why did the skeleton break up with her boyfriend before Valentine’s Day? He didn’t have the guts to stay with her!
23. How does Moses make coffee on Valentine’s Day? Hebrews it!
24. Why don’t mummies have Valentine’s Day? Because they’re afraid to unwrap their hearts!
25. How did the phone propose to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day? He gave her a ring!
26. Why don’t oysters share their pearls on Valentine’s Day? Because they’re shellfish!
27. What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day? I’m stuck on you!
28. Why did the bike fall over on Valentine’s Day? It was two-tired!
29. What did the elephant say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day? I love you a ton!
30. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert on Valentine’s Day? She was stuffed!
31. What did the paper clip say to the magnet on Valentine’s Day? I find you very attractive!
February Puns (12)
32. February may be short, but it’s always a great time for chocolates and sweets.
33. What did the calendar say to February? Stop being so short with me!
34. February is here, time to break out the winter blues.
35. February is so boring, it feels like it drags on forevuary.
36. I wanted to tell a joke about February 2nd, but it would just ground-hog day.
37. February is sweeter than stealing candy from a baby.
38. Roses are red, violets are blue, I hate Valentine’s Day, how about you?
39. February may be cold but love keeps me warm, said no one ever.
40. What do you call two birds in love in February? Tweethearts!
41. February is shorter than a Kardashian marriage.
42. They say February is for love, but I’ll be hangin’ with my dove (chocolate).
43. What did the chocolate box say to the fridge? I’m just staying in here until February 15th.
