Rat Puns (10)
1. What do you call a rat that eats too much cheese? A curd muncher!
2. Why don’t rats live in the ocean? Because there’s too much water rat-tling around down there!
3. Why did the rat cross the road? To prove it wasn’t chicken!
4. What do you call a rat who hangs out with skateboarders? A radent!
5. Why do rats make good journalists? They always sniff out a good story!
6. What do you call a fashionable rat? A mouse-to-rat!
7. Why don’t rats live in outer space? There’s no atmosphere!
8. Why did the rat stand on top of the refrigerator? He wanted to feel taller!
9. What do you call a rat magician? An abra-rat-cadabra!
10. What do rats dream about at night? Cheese!
Rat One-Liners (10)
11. I was going to tell a joke about rats, but it stinks.
12. What’s a rat’s favorite musical instrument? The squeaka-phone!
13. Why did the rat cross the road? To rat on the other side!
14. How do rats stay connected? On their rat work!
15. Why did the rat climb up the toilet? For a better view of things!
16. What do you call a rat on a cookbook? A reci-PEST!
17. What do you call a rat who wins the lottery? A lucky rat!
18. How do rats stay in shape? By hitting the ratmill!
19. What do you call a group of rats playing instruments? A rat band!
20. Why are rats such messy eaters? They don’t have any taboos!
Best Rat Jokes (33)
21. What do you call a rat with an eye patch and a peg leg? Pest-ily the Pirat!
22. Why did the rat walk into the shoe store? He needed a new pair of rat sneakers!
23. What do you call a line of rats? A queue-eue!
24. Why don’t rats live on Mars? There’s no air up there!
25. Knock knock. Who’s there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes your ratty friend coming over to eat all your cheese!
26. What did the mama rat say to her misbehaving baby? Ratscallion!
27. Why was the rat afraid to go to school? His friends were going to rat him out!
28. Why do sewer rats have such shiny coats? Because they take a lot of showers!
29. What did the rat name his pet turtle? Shelldon!
30. Why do rats have such crummy apartments? Because they don’t make enough cheddar to afford anything nicer!
31. How does a rat cook his food? With lots of squeak and oil!
32. Why was the rat upset after finishing a maze? Because it was the rat race!
33. Why don’t rats live in the jungle? Too many snakes to rat-tle them!
34. What kind of cheese do rats eat? Munster cheese – it’s ghoul-dang tasty!
35. Why do rats have tails? So they have something to hang on to when the cat chases them!
36. What do you call a rat who works out? A gym rat!
37. Why did the rat tiptoe into the kitchen? He didn’t want to wake anyone up!
38. How do rats keep their clothes clean? With frequent rat-a-tat-tat laundry days!
39. What do you call a rat in a suit and tie? Dapper rat!
40. Why do rats have such good night vision? So they can find the cheese in the dark!
41. How does a rat fix a sink? With a wratchet set!
42. Why don’t rats live at the North Pole? Too cold without any rat scarves!
43. What do you call a rapper rat? Lil’ Squeaker!
44. Why are rats so good at hide and seek? They’re expert squeakers!
45. What’s a rat’s favorite dessert? Cheesecake – the rattier the better!
46. Why don’t rats water ski? They don’t like getting rat tails!
47. How does a rat smell? With his little rat nose!
48. What do you call a psychic rat? A fortune smeller!
49. How do rats get around town? By ratro!
50. Why are rats so jumpy? They get easily rattled!
51. What do rats put on top of pizza? Extra cheesums!
52. Why do rats make bad taxi drivers? They tailgate too much!
53. What’s a rat’s favorite day of the week? Cheese-day!