Ninja Puns
- What do you call a ninja who is into fashion? A Belt Ninja!
- Why don’t ninjas ever get sick? They have incredible immune systems.
- How does a ninja stay warm in winter? They wear longjohns.
- What do you call a ninja who sells coffee? A Barista Ninja.
- Why are ninjas so good at gardening? They have green thumbs.
- What do you call a ninja magician? An illusioninja.
- What do you call a ninja who works at a bakery? A Baking Ninja.
- Why can’t you hear a ninja using the bathroom? They’re very quiet pee-ers.
- What do you call a ninja without good manners? Ill-ninja.
- Why do ninjas make bad Uber drivers? They only get 2 stars.
Ninja One-Liners
- I failed ninja training because I’m terrible at sneak attacks.
- Don’t worry, my plan is foolninja.
- I’m writing a book on ninja history. Currently my draft is unpublished.
- Never ask a ninja for a piggyback ride.
- How does a ninja cook dinner? They chop and wok away.
- Don’t argue with a ninja. They’re known for cutting remarks.
- Ninjas make great personal trainers. Their clients always get killer abs!
- What’s a ninja’s favorite type of pants? Jogja.
- How does a ninja know it’s Christmas? They can sense presents.
- Don’t try to race a ninja. They’re always a step ahead of you.
Best Ninja Jokes
1. A young ninja in training was trying to sneak through a village undetected. He tiptoed across the road, hid behind a tree, then rolled across an open field. When he made it to the other side he looked back, satisfied that he had gone completely unnoticed. Unbeknownst to him, there was a ninja master watching his progress the entire time.
“You know you still have much to learn,” said the master. “You were sloppy and undisciplined. I spotted you immediately.”
“But master!” replied the student. “No one in the village raised any alarm. I must have remained hidden.”
The old master just smiled. “The villagers are not ninjas like me. To an untrained eye you were never seen. But to a master of our arts, your footsteps sound like thunder and your breathing hurricane winds.”
The young ninja took the master’s words to heart and trained for many years until even the wise old master could no longer detect his presence.
2. Deep in the bamboo forests of feudal Japan, a ronin samurai was walking along an overgrown path, lost in thought. As he turned a corner, he came upon a young boy kneeling in the middle of the road. The boy had a focused look on his face as he dutifully practiced his ninja skills.
The samurai was impressed by the boy’s dedication to perfecting his martial arts techniques. He watched quietly from a distance as the boy leapt, rolled, and swung his stick, immersing himself fully in his imaginary battles against invisible opponents.
After several minutes, the samurai approached the boy. “You have a great spirit, young one,” he said. “Never lose your focus or determination, and continue perfecting your skills. With practice and perseverance, you will become a formidable ninja one day.”
The boy bowed respectfully to the samurai. “Thank you for your kind words, sir. I hope to be as skilled and honorable as the great ninja masters before me.”
The samurai smiled and continued on his way, confident the future of the ninja arts was in good hands.
3. It was a dark night and a ninja was sneaking into a warlord’s fort. He stealthily climbed the stone walls and slipped past the patrolling guards. Once inside the main keep, he snuck down corridors until he came upon the warlord’s chambers. The ninja slowly opened the door, creeping toward the large canopy bed in the shadows.
Just then, the warlord leapt out of bed, katana in hand. The ninja was shocked – his approach had been soundless, there’s no way the warlord could have heard him. But the warlord just scoffed.
“Fool ninja. Did you think I wouldn’t notice the light slowly fading, minute by minute, as you blocked the moonbeams shining through my window with your head?”
The ninja glanced back and realized his mistake. He had failed to account for the one thing he could not change – the shape of his own silhouette.
4. Little Timmy went to his first day of ninja training, ready to learn the arts of stealth and combat. When he arrived at the dojo, the sensei told him, “Your first task is to walk across the courtyard without making a sound.”
Timmy nodded and began tiptoeing slowly across the stones. However, his shoes still made scuffing noises. The sensei said “You must be lighter on your feet! Take off your shoes.”
So Timmy removed his shoes and walked across again in just his socks. But the sensei shook his head, saying “Still too much noise. Remove your socks.”
Timmy did so, carefully walking across the courtyard barefoot. But the sensei insisted “I can still hear your feet slap the ground. Try again without making a sound.”
Timmy was frustrated. How could he walk without his feet making any noise at all? He tried one last time, lifting his legs high and putting each foot down as gently as possible.
When Timmy finally reached the other side, the sensei smiled. “Well done. You have passed the first test – walking without making a sound.”
Timmy beamed, proud he had completed his very first ninja training challenge.
5. On a still night, a silent shadow slipped over the stone walls of the castle. It was Kage, master ninja, who had never failed a mission. Tonight’s task was simple – sneak into the warlord’s chambers and steal the scroll of forbidden ninjutsu techniques.
Kage crept through moonlit corridors without stirring a single speck of dust. Up winding stairs and down empty halls he flowed like the night wind. At last he reached the warlord’s room and there, on the desk, sat the scroll. But as Kage reached for it, the tip of his finger brushed the vase next to it. The vase rocked, tottered and shattered loudly on the floor.
The warlord sat bolt upright in his bed. “My vase! Who goes there?” he shouted. But Kage was already gone, vanished into the shadows.
The warlord inspected the damage and was baffled. His vase was destroyed, yet the precious scroll remained. He never realized just how close he came to losing it that night to the stealthy Kage.
6. Jake was excited for his first ever ninja lesson. He arrived at the training hall early and bowed respectfully to Sensei Akira.
“For your first test, you must walk across the floor without making a sound” said Akira.
Jake nodded and began creeping slowly across the wooden floorboards on his tip toes. But despite his best efforts, the boards still creaked under his weight.
Akira shook his head. “Not silent enough! Remove your shoes and try again.”
Jake carefully tiptoed across barefoot. But Akira said “I can still hear noises. You must be lighter than air!”
Frustrated, Jake tried over and over, but couldn’t stop the occasional creak. Finally, he turned to Sensei Akira. “Master, perhaps we need to apply oil to the floorboards so they won’t make any sounds?”
Akira smiled. “Very wise, Jake! You have passed the test – a true ninja finds solutions instead of accepting failure.”
7. Little Benny was so excited for his first ninja lesson. He arrived early at the dojo, eager to begin his training.
Sensei Wu told Benny his first task was to walk across the room without making a sound. Benny nodded confidently and began tiptoeing slowly across the squeaky wooden floor.
But try as he might, the boards still creaked loudly under Benny’s weight. Sensei Wu shook his head – the noise was unacceptable for a stealthy ninja.
Benny pondered how he could walk silently. Then his face lit up with an idea. He took off his ninja tabi boots and carefully tiptoed in just his socks. But Sensei Wu could still hear noises.
Stumped again, Benny surveyed the room. He noticed the thick tatami mats lining the walls. Benny had another idea! He dragged the mats onto the floor, creating a sound-dampening path to walk across.
Smiling proudly, Benny tiptoed noiselessly over the mats. Sensei Wu laughed and clapped – Benny had passed his first lesson with clever creativity!
8. Michael was overjoyed to start his ninja training, but his first lesson was a frustrating one. His sensei instructed him to walk across the dojo without making a single sound. But the creaky wooden floor betrayed his steps.
After many failed attempts, Michael grew discouraged. He wanted to be a great ninja like those in the stories, not some loud amateur. Sensing his student’s dejection, the wise sensei spoke.
“Do not despair, young one. True ninja mastery does not come from one silent walk, but the patience and perseverance of many. This exercise is but the first stitch in the tapestry of your training. With time and practice, you will move through this world as a whispering wind.”
Reassured, Michael tried again and again, his footsteps growing softer each time. Years later, he would glide across even the most perilous terrain without a sound. But it all began with a single squeaking step across an old wood floor.
9. Mark couldn’t wait to start his ninja training. On his first day, the sensei instructed him to walk across the dojo without making a sound. Eager to prove himself, Mark set off lightly tiptoeing across the creaky floor.
But try as he might, the wooden boards still groaned and creaked loudly under his steps. Mark winced – so much for stealthy ninja moves.
The sensei said calmly, “Do not be discouraged. The journey to ninja mastery is long, but each small lesson builds your skills.”
Mark nodded, determined to succeed. He pondered how to solve this challenge. Then he had an idea – his sweatshirt! Mark carefully spread his sweatshirt along the floor to muffle the sounds of his footsteps.
Grinning, Mark tiptoed noiselessly across the padded pathway of fabric. When he reached the end, the sensei applauded his inventive solution.
From that day on, Mark approached every ninja trial with creativity and patience. He came to understand that this was the true way of the ninja.
10. For Kaito’s first ninja lesson, his teacher instructed him to walk across the training hall without making a sound. Kaito nodded and began creeping slowly across the room on his tiptoes. But the wooden floorboards still creaked and groaned with each step.
His teacher shook her head. “You must move in complete silence to master the stealth of a ninja.”
Kaito tried again and again, striving to walk softly and lightly. But each attempt ended in noisy failure.
He grew frustrated. How could he possibly fix the loud floorboards? Then he had a clever idea. Kaito removed his robes and carefully laid them out as a path across the floor. He silently tiptoed across the cloth’s muffling barrier.
When Kaito reached the end, he bowed to his teacher, who was smiling proudly.
“Well done, Kaito! You have passed the test by finding an innovative solution. This is the true way of the ninja.”
Kaito beamed, ready to face the next challenge on his journey to becoming a ninja master.
11. Young Yuto was eager to begin his ninja training. For his first test, Sensei Sato instructed him to walk across the dojo without making a single sound. Excited to prove himself, Yuto set off tiptoeing lightly across the creaky wooden floor.
But try as he might, the boards groaned loudly under each step, the noise echoing through the quiet dojo. Yuto winced, disappointed in his loud failure.
Sensei Sato said gently, “Do not lose heart, my student. True mastery requires patience and persistence.”
Yuto nodded, determined to succeed. He carefully observed the room, looking for a solution. His gaze fell upon the straw tatami mats lining the walls. That’s it!
Yuto gathered up the mats and placed them in a path across the floor. He then softly tiptoed across the makeshift surface. Reaching the end without a single sound, Yuto bowed proudly to Sensei Sato.
“Excellent solution, Yuto! You have passed the first test on your journey to becoming a ninja.”
12. Tyler’s first ninja lesson was to walk across the training hall in complete silence. But the loud creaking of the hardwood floor betrayed his footsteps. Tyler winced at each noisy board, anxious to prove his stealth.
His sensei shook her head in disappointment. “You must move like a shadow, make no sound at all!”
Tyler tried again and again, but could not stop the telltale creaks. Frustrated, he studied the room for ideas. He noticed the woven straw tatami mats decorating the walls.
Tyler had a plan! Moving the tatami mats to create a pathway, he soundlessly tiptoed across their noise-dampening surface.
When Tyler reached the end without a single creak, he turned and bowed proudly to his grinning sensei.
“Very innovative solution! You have passed the first test – the resourcefulness of a ninja.” Tyler smiled, ready to face the next challenge.
13. It was Antony’s first ever ninja lesson. His teacher Master Liwei instructed him to walk across the training hall without making a sound. Antony took a deep breath and began creeping across the wooden floor.
But despite his cautious steps, the old boards creaked and groaned loudly beneath Antony’s feet. Master Liwei frowned and shook his head – a ninja must tread silently.
Antony tried again and again, striving to lightly tip-toe across the noisy boards. But each attempt ended in embarrassing failure.
He was ready to give up in frustration when suddenly Antony noticed the woven tatami mats lining the hall walls. That’s it!Moving the mats onto the floor, he created a sound-dampening path and noiselessly crossed to Master Liwei’s approving grin.
From that day forward, Antony approached every ninja trial as a problem to be solved creatively. With patience and persistence, he progressed on his journey to become a true shadow warrior.
14. For Kai’s first ninja lesson, his sensei instructed him to walk across the dojo without making a sound. Kai smiled confidently and began sneaking across the creaky wooden floor. But despite his soft steps, the boards still loudly groaned and betrayed his presence.
Kai’s smile faded. His sensei shook her head – such heavy footsteps would never do for a stealthy ninja.
Feeling disheartened, Kai tried to brainstorm a solution. Looking around the room, he noticed the woven tatami mats decorating the walls. Kai had an idea!
Carefully laying out the mats into a pathway, Kai soundlessly crept across the noise-dampening surface. When he reached the end without a single creak, he turned and bowed proudly to his grinning sensei.
From that moment on, Kai approached every ninja test as a puzzle to solve with creativity. Steadily, through patience and determination, he mastered the art of the silent unseen step.
15. 10-year-old Sara was thrilled to begin her ninja training. For her first lesson, the sensei instructed Sara to walk across the dojo without making a sound. She tip-toed slowly across the creaky wooden floor but winced as the boards loudly groaned under each step.
The sensei shook his head. “You must move more silently to be a ninja!” Sara tried again but the loud creaks persisted.
Discouraged, Sara surveyed the room for a solution. She noticed the tatami mats lining the walls and had an idea. Carefully laying the mats out as a pathway, she noiselessly crossed the muffling surface.
When Sara reached the end without a single creak, she turned and bowed proudly to the grinning sensei.
From that day forward, she embraced every ninja challenge with patience and creativity. With practice, Sara learned to move through the world in complete silence
