Latvian Puns
1. What do you call a Latvian who loves to read? A bookworm!
2. Why can’t you borrow money from a Latvian? They’re always a little short!
3. What do you get when you cross a Latvian and a vampire? A person who likes their stakes high!
4. Why do Latvians make bad hairdressers? They always cut too short!
5. What do you call a sleepy Latvian? A nap-vian!
6. Why are Latvians so good at trivia? They know a little about a lot!
7. What happens to a Latvian in a horror movie? They usually get the short end of the stick!
8. Why don’t Latvians take up much space? There’s never too much of them!
9. What do you call a Latvian who loves music? A hip-hop-vian!
10. Why are Latvians afraid to fly in hot air balloons? They don’t want to get too high up!
11. How do Latvians party? Short and sweet!
Latvian One-Liners
12. I took a pole to see how many Latvians it would take to change a light bulb – it came up a little short!
13. Did you hear about the new Latvian phone book? It’s only one page long!
14. Why don’t Latvians play basketball? Because they all come up short!
15. What do you call a Latvian who left their car unlocked? A little foolish!
16. How do you fit 100 Latvians in a car? Tell them it’s a clown car!
17. Why are Latvians so bad at limbo? The bar is always too high!
18. What do you call a Latvian with a medical degree? Just a little doctor!
19. Did you hear about the new Latvian scholarship? It came up short on funding!
20. Why don’t Latvians go camping in the woods? They have a shortness of supplies!
21. How does every Latvian joke start? A little predictably!
Best Latvian Jokes
22. One day a Latvian man was feeling down so he decided to go to the doctor. He told the doctor, “Doctor, I am feeling very sad, down in the dumps.” The doctor replied, “Well I have just the cure for that! Here is a book of Latvian jokes, guaranteed to make anyone laugh.” The Latvian man was puzzled and asked, “But doctor, why Latvian jokes? I am Latvian!” The doctor smiled and said, “Exactly!”
23. What do you call a gathering of 100 Latvians? A short meeting.
24. Three Latvians walked into a bar. You’d think one of them would’ve seen it.
25. A Latvian man sees a job advertisement: “Comedian wanted, must be funny.” He decides to apply for the job and goes to the audition. The casting director looks at the Latvian man and says “Alright, tell me a joke and make me laugh.” The Latvian man replies “My life.
26. Why don’t Latvians drinkTEA? Because they find the taste a little WEAK.
27. Did you hear about the new Latvian phone book? It’s only ONE page long.
28. What happens when a Latvian walks into a wall? He breaks his nose.
29. Did you hear about the short Latvian? He struggled to reach the top shelf.
30. Why do Latvians laugh three times when you tell a joke? Once when you tell it, once when you explain it, and once when they understand it.
31. A Latvian man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender looks at him suspiciously and asks “I need to see some ID please.” The Latvian man replies “But I’m clearly over 21!” The bartender says “I know, I just wanted to see something that said you were tall.”
32. How does a Latvian cook dinner? On a short stove!
33. Did you hear about the Latvian who couldn’t reach the control panel? Yeah, it was over his head!
34. Why aren’t there more Latvian astronauts? They don’t meet the height requirements!
35. What do you call two Latvians playing catch? A short toss!
36. Why do Latvians wear platform shoes? To reach new heights!
37. Did you hear about the Latvian basketball team? They came up short!
38. Why can’t Latvians be lawyers? They always fall short of the bar!
39. How do you start a lawn mower in Latvia? You stand it up against a wall and let it fall down.
40. Why do Latvians hate lightning? It’s always striking them down to size!
41. Why are Latvians so good at limbo? Because the bar was set so low!
42. Why did the Latvian bring a ladder to work? He wanted to climb the corporate ladder!
43. Why was the Latvian man fired from the calendar factory? He took too many days off!
44. Did you hear about the new Latvian restaurant? It is always coming up short on food!
45. Why do Latvians make terrible lifeguards? They can never reach far enough to save you!
