Axolotl Puns 1. What do you call an axolotl that tells jokes? A pun-dolotl! 2. Why don’t axolotls get jobs as comedians? Their jokes are too pun-gent! 3. What’s an axolotl’s favorite type of joke? Puns! They find them very a-musing. 4. How does an axolotl feel when it tells a really good pun? It’s …
Patricia Gonzalez
Crystal Puns 1. I tried to make a crystal ball to see the future, but I just ended up with a glass sphere of quartz-tions. 2. Did you hear about the geologist who was crystal clear about her love of minerals? She was a quartz-struck girl. 3. I was hoping to buy my friend a …
Cooking Puns (20) I wanted to make banana bread but I kept slipping up. I guess I’m just not very a-peel-ing in the kitchen. My friend got injured trying to grate cheese. I told him to stay positive, but he said it was a grater tragedy. The chefs were trying to keep their soup a …
Construction Puns What do you call a nervous construction worker? A wrecking ball. Why did the construction worker get fired? He worked riveting jobs. How does a construction worker party? They raise the roof. Why was the construction worker embarrassed? He work short shorts. Why was the nail artist excited for construction work? It would …
Factory Puns (10) 1. I heard the factory down the street makes great products. I bet they have a good process of elimination. 2. The factory wasn’t very eco-friendly. They had a lot of toxic assets. 3. The factory was struggling financially. They had to work round the clock to make ends meet. 4. The …
Shovel Puns 1. I bought my shovel at a yard sale. It was dirt cheap! 2. What did the shovel say to the face? Slap! 3. My shovel is very nosy. It’s always digging up dirt. 4. I was going to tell a joke about shovels, but it was too dirty. 5. Why do shovels …
Blind Puns I went to an auction where they were selling some braille books. I decided not to bid though, because I couldn’t read between the lines. My blind friend got a cheese grater for his birthday. He said it was the most violent book he’s ever read. I asked my blind friend if he …
Fudge Puns What do you call a fudge maker who is full of themselves? A fudge packer. Why was the fudge sad? It felt crummy. I made a batch of fudge but accidentally used salt instead of sugar. You could say I made a salty fudge packer. My friend got addicted to fudge. I told …
Earthquake Puns 1. I was going to tell a joke about earthquakes, but I decided not to because it might come across as shaking. 2. Did you hear about the new restaurant called Quake ‘N Bake? Their motto is, “We’ll shake you up and cook you up!” 3. Why was the seismologist fired from his …
Kale Puns 1. I couldn’t find my keys this morning, so I decided to retrace my steps… which led me back to the fridge where I was snacking on kale at 3am. 2. My friend called and asked me how I was doing. I said, “Oh, you know, just living that kale life.” 3. What …