Lent Puns (30) What do you call a guy who gives up snacks for Lent? Abstinent. Why was the chocolate bar excited for Lent to be over? It wanted to be eaten again! I’m so hungry during Lent I could eat a horse. Actually, I would if the Catholic Church didn’t forbid it! My wife …
Michelle Wilson
Rabbit Puns 1. What do you call a three-legged rabbit? A hop-along. 2. Why was the rabbit so happy? It was having a hoppy day. 3. How do rabbits travel? By hareplane. 4. What do you call a happy rabbit? A hoppy bunny. 5. Why shouldn’t you tell a rabbit a secret? Because it might …
Physics Puns 1. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now. 2. A photon checks into a hotel and the bellhop asks him if he has any luggage. The photon replies “No, I’m traveling light.” 3. Did you hear about the bartender who was arrested for serving alcohol after hours? He said …
Wheelchair Puns 1. I wanted to get new wheels for my chair, but they were too expensive. I guess I’ll just have to wheel and deal. 2. My friend was telling me about his new electric wheelchair. I told him it sounds absolutely revo-wheely good. 3. I was feeling down so I decided to go …
Whales Puns (30) 1. What do you call a whale that eats a lot of iron? A ferrous cetacean. 2. I was whale watching and said “Oh no, a whale is about to crush our boat!” My friend responded “Whale, whale, whale, what do we have here?” 3. What do you call a depressed whale? …
Tricycle Puns 1. I asked my friend why he was riding a tricycle. He said, “I’m just going through a mid-life cy-cle.” 2. My tricycle got a flat tire so I took it to the bike shop. They said I needed a new tri-patch. 3. I entered my tricycle in a bike race. It was …
Tin Man Puns 1. The Tin Man decided to go on a diet, but he found he just cannoli lose weight. 2. The Tin Man was feeling rusty, so he decided to oil out for a bit. 3. The Tin Man entered a pie eating contest, but he ended up getting sheet metal all over …
Funeral Puns (20) 1. I heard the funeral director was offering a bier deal on caskets this week. 2. The grieving widow was coffin up a lot of emotions at her husband’s funeral. 3. The deceased man’s brother gave a grave speech at the funeral. 4. The funeral home had a dead serious no cell …
Big Forehead Puns (15) 1. I tried to read their forehead, but I couldn’t get past the first page. 2. They say people with big foreheads are smart, in that case, their forehead must be a genius. 3. I asked them to tell me what’s on their mind, and they pointed to their forehead. 4. …
Graduation Puns (15) 1. I heard the valedictorian’s speech was very concise and to the Dean’s list. 2. The honor students were really on a roll at graduation. Their parents must be so proudough of them. 3. Why did the graduate bring scissors to the ceremony? To cut the tension! 4. How did the art …