Food Puns 1. I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off! 2. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He didn’t get hurt because it was a soft drink. 3. Why do melons have weddings? …
Katherine Miller
Hand Puns 1. I’m not very handy when it comes to DIY projects. I guess you could say I’m all thumbs. 2. My friend got a tattoo of a hand on his hand. I asked him why and he said, “I got it so I’ll always have a handhand.” 3. Did you hear about the …
Pool Puns 1. Why was the lifeguard so upset when someone peed in the pool? It really made her urine trouble. 2. Why couldn’t the pool player pay attention during class? He was too focused on his pool of thought. 3. What do you call someone who loves playing pool, painting, and singing? A poolymath. …
Peach Puns Peaches come from a can, they were put there by a man. In a factory downtown. If I had my little way, I’d eat peaches every day. Did you hear about the beauty pageant for peaches? It was quite the pitty party. That peach pie looks so good, it’s makin’ my mouth water. …
Octopus Puns 1. What do you call an octopus that only has seven legs? A heptapus! 2. Why don’t octopuses like to share? Because they’re octo-puss! 3. What do you call an octopus who loves hugs? Octo-puss! 4. What do you call an octopus who works out? An octo-buff! 5. Why was the octopus asked …
Morning Puns (15) 1. I tried waking up early this morning, but I just couldn’t rise to the occasion. 2. My friend asked me how my morning was going. I told him, “So far, so good!” 3. I heard there’s a new type of alarm clock that makes coffee for you when it goes off. …
Milk Puns What do you call a cow that tells jokes? A comedy moo-er. What do you call milk that isn’t yours? Nacho milk. Why was the milk tired when it got home from work? It had a long dairy. What do you call a cow that plays guitar? A moosician. Why did the cows …
Super Bowl Puns 1. I wanted to bet on the Super Bowl, but couldn’t decide which team to pick. It was a real coin toss. 2. I heard two football teams are fighting over the Super Bowl trophy. There’s some real bowl envy going on. 3. The Super Bowl champions were invited to visit the …
Chicken Wing Puns 1. I wanted to make a pun about chicken wings, but I’m worried it would just be a fowl attempt. 2. The chicken wasn’t up for making any more wing puns. It told me to quit while I was a cluck ahead. 3. Did you hear about the new restaurant that only …
Boots Puns What do you call a boot that loves math? A calculator! Why was the boot unhappy at the shoe store? It felt like the odd one out! Why are cowboy boots so clingy? They just want to get attached at the heel. What do you call boots made from bananas? Slippers! Why do …