Snowflake Puns 1. I wanted to make a snowflake pun, but they’re all too derivative. 2. What do you call a snowflake who works as a DJ? A snowspiner! 3. Why was the snowflake upset? He was having a meltdown! 4. My friend got mad when I called him a snowflake. He said, “I’m unique …
Jennifer Martinez
Lego Puns What do you call a Lego brick that takes all your money? A robble. Why was the Lego man sent to jail? He was caught with some illegal blocks. How do Legos get clean? They take a block bath. Why can’t you trust Lego pirates? They’re always trying to steal your bricks. What …
Ostrich Puns (10) 1. I wanted to make an ostrich sandwich, but I couldn’t find the breaded. 2. The ostrich was feeling down, so I tried to ostrich-size him up. 3. The ostrich was acting paranoid. I told him to stop being so ostrich-cious. 4. I saw an ostrich at the gym. He was really …
Telephone Puns I tried to call the psychic hotline but the phone just rang and rang. No one answered – I guess they didn’t see that coming! My friend called me to complain about his telephone bills. He must have really wanted to get something off his chest. I picked up the phone and dialed …
Surgery Puns 1. I asked my surgeon to give me a nose job, but he must have misheard me because he gave me a knows job instead! 2. My friend just had heart surgery. Now he’s feeling a lot better and says he has more heart than ever before! 3. I was feeling a little …
Stairs Puns (10) 1. I tried to think of a good pun about stairs, but it was too many steps. 2. What do you call stairs that lead up to nowhere? Futility steps. 3. Why was the staircase angry? It was always being walked all over. 4. Why don’t spiraling staircases get along? They’re always …
Smoking Puns (25) I tried to quit smoking cold turkey, but I ended up with a smoked bird instead. My friend got lung cancer from smoking. He’s kicking the habit now that he’s got a breathTaking view. Smokers never die, they just get filtered out. With all these anti-smoking campaigns, it feels like big tobacco …
Shoes Puns (15) 1. I can’t believe I got fired from the shoe factory. Apparently I just wasn’t cut out for the boot business. 2. My friend got hit in the head with a shoe. He was lucky it was a loafer. 3. I asked the shoe salesman to give me something with a bit …
School Puns 1. I used to hate math, but then I realized decimals have a point. 2. I was struggling in art class until I finally drew the line. 3. My teacher told me to pay attention, so I gave her a quarter. 4. I failed Russian literature. Tolstoy was just too long for me. …
Punjabi Puns 1. What do you call a Punjabi who loves math? A Sikh geek! 2. Why don’t Punjabis play hide and seek? Because no one can find ’em! 3. Why do Punjabis make great detectives? They’re always Punjabding for clues. 4. What do you call a Punjabi phone? A Punjaberry. 5. Why did the …