Bridges Puns
1. I heard they’re building a new bridge in town. I hope it spans expectations!
2. Did you hear about the new bridge? It was engineered by a guy named Archie.
3. I tried to cross the bridge, but it was out. Looks like I’ll have to find an alt route.
4. I wanted to tell a joke about a bridge, but it probably won’t connect with people.
5. The old bridge started cracking. I guess you could say it had a riveting problem.
6. The engineers designed an amazing new bridge. You could say it was a work of arcitecture.
7. I heard they’re tearing down the old bridge to build a new one. About time they got over it!
8. That rickety old bridge is still standing but just barely. It’s definitely on its last legs.
9. I wanted to make a suspension bridge for my model railroad. But the design was up in the air.
10. The new bridge was supposed to open today, but work has been suspended.
Bridges One-Liners
11. I avoid bridges because they’re always over troubled water.
12. Bridges connect people – so build more bridges, and less walls.
13. Don’t burn bridges. You never know when you might need to cross back over.
14. A bridge to the future is always under construction.
15. Building bridges is better than building walls.
16. Bridges take you places you’ve never been before.
17. A bridge between two cultures creates understanding.
18. Build a bridge of friendship and walk across together.
19. Bridges connect us to each other and to new possibilities.
20. Burning bridges leaves you stranded on an island of isolation.
Best Bridges Jokes
21. Two engineers were standing on opposite sides of a slow-moving river, arguing over the best place to build a new bridge. The first engineer insisted it should be built right where they were standing. “This is the narrowest point, so it will save materials,” he said. The second engineer shook his head. “No, the bridge should be built 100 yards downstream, where the river bends. It will be able to carry more traffic.” They kept arguing back and forth, neither budging from their position. Finally, the first engineer had an idea. “Let’s each build a bridge to prove our point. We’ll meet back here in one month and see whose bridge works better.” The second engineer agreed. One month later, the two engineers returned. But there was no bridge where the first engineer said he would build his. Confused, he walked downstream, and saw the second engineer smiling on his new bridge. “I built my bridge downstream like I said I would,” the second engineer said proudly. “But what happened to your bridge?” The first engineer shrugged sheepishly. “Well, I started building where I said I would, but you were right – the river was too wide there. So I kept walking downstream looking for a narrower point…and just kept walking and walking until I finally came to your bridge.”
22. A truck driver was driving his big rig over a bridge one day when he saw a little girl playing with a beach ball nearby. Just as he drove by, a gust of wind blew the beach ball onto the bridge right in his path. He tried to swerve to avoid it but misjudged the size of his truck, causing him to hit the side railing of the bridge. He ended up getting stuck trying to maneuver his truck back into the lane, and caused a huge traffic jam with cars backed up for miles behind him. The truck driver felt terrible and walked back to find the little girl who was playing with the beach ball. He asked her, “Hey sweetie, I’m really sorry but do you know about the beach ball that blew onto the bridge?” The little girl looked up at him quizzically and replied, “What beach ball, mister? I’ve just been playing here with my new puppy all day!”
23. Three engineers were having an argument over which type of engineer was the best. The mechanical engineer argued “Mechanical engineers are clearly the best – we design and build all of the things that make the world work!” The civil engineer disagreed “No way, civil engineers are the most important, we design and build all of the infrastructure that connects society.” The electrical engineer just laughed and said “You’re both wrong. Electrical engineers are the greatest because we harness the power of electricity to run everything that YOU build!” They continued arguing until a beautiful woman walked by. The mechanical engineer proclaimed “I should date her because I can design custom machines to impress her!” The civil engineer scoffed “No, I should date her because I can build bridges, roads, and houses for her!” The electrical engineer smiled and said “I don’t need to build her anything. I’ll just make sure her lights come on!”
24. Why do bridges smell? Because they have trusses!
25. What do you call someone who is afraid of bridges? A spanophobic.
26. How do bridges communicate? They use tower signals!
