Mardi Gras Puns
- What do you call a Mardi Gras parade float that plays jazz music? A New Orleans brass band-wagon!
- Why was the Southern belle so tired after Mardi Gras? She had a ball gown all day!
- My friend got hit by a bunch of Mardi Gras beads. Good thing he wasn’t injured, they were just throws.
- Want to know how a Mardi Gras krewe comes up with their parade theme? They throme ideas around.
- Did you hear about the new diet craze sparked by Mardi Gras? It’s called the Fat Tuesday plan.
- Why can’t you borrow money from a Mardi Gras reveler? Because they’re completely lent-less.
- The street sweeper started work immediately after the Mardi Gras parade ended. He knew there was no time to Waste Monday.
- Our Mardi Gras parade got rained out. Talk about a wet blanket on the festivities!
- I tried to catch some Mardi Gras beads but I mishandled the situation completely.
- My friend got crushed by a giant Mardi Gras mask. Luckily it was just a floatilla accident.
Mardi Gras One-Liners
- I ate so much King Cake I started having visions of royalty.
- Laissez les bons temps rouler, as they say in New Orleans!
- My Mardi Gras beads are so shiny you can see your reflection in them!
- I caught more beads than a French Quarter balcony!
- My mask collection is so big I had to throw a Mardi Gras themed party just to wear them all.
- I love Mardi Gras – any excuse for a party and beads!
- You haven’t lived until you’ve flashed someone for Mardi Gras beads.
- I ate more jambalaya and gumbo on Mardi Gras than everyone in Louisiana combined.
- My favorite thing about Mardi Gras is the elaborate costumes…and the people watching!
- You know it’s a great Mardi Gras when you wake up the next morning and don’t remember it!
Best Mardi Gras Jokes
1. My friend invited me to go to Mardi Gras with him this year but said I’d need to help pay for gas. I told him, “Sure, I’ll pitch in for gas. But it will cost you an arm and a leg to ride with me!
2. Did you hear about the pirate who got arrested at Mardi Gras? He was charged with dwi…drinking while arrrrrghing!
3. What did the police officer say to the drunk pirate at Mardi Gras? “You’re under a-rrrest for public intox-arrrr-cation!”
4. Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Mardi Gras parade? He had no body to go with!
5. How do you fix a broken Mardi Gras mask? With a Masquer-aid kit!
6. What’s a frog’s favorite thing about Mardi Gras? Getting to wear a fly mask and costume!
7. Why didn’t anyone see the ghost at the Mardi Gras parade? Because he had no booooody with him!
8. My Mardi Gras beads are so long I can lasso people with them from my parade float!
9. What did the police officer say to the group of pirates at Mardi Gras? “Ahoy there mateys, y’all better behave yeselves!”
10. Why do zombies make the best Mardi Gras parade marchers? Because they never get tired and always keep marching on!
11. What’s a duck’s favorite Mardi Gras throw? A quack bead necklace!
12. How did the claustrophobic person feel at Mardi Gras? Mardis-stressed!
13. Why was the Southern belle exhausted after Mardi Gras? She had been up and about all day long gown from one parade and party to the next!
14. Did you hear about the pirate’s wild night at Mardi Gras? He drank so much he woke up with a terrible hango-ARRGG-ver!
15. Why did the police officer have to keep escorting the pirate away from Mardi Gras? He was guilty of lewd and lacivious arrrrr!”
16. What’s a cow’s favorite Mardi Gras accessory? A cowbell necklace of course!
17. What instrument does a jazz musician dread playing in a Mardi Gras parade? The tuba…because it’s too heavy!
18. Did you hear about the termite who snuck into Mardi Gras? He had a ball nibbling on all the parade floats!
19. Why was the Southern belle in shock after Mardi Gras? So many men had hollered for her to show her “Mammaries!”
20. What’s a skeleton’s favorite part about Mardi Gras? Getting to come out of the closet and party!