Eclipse Puns (25)
1. I heard two astronomers got into a fight. It was an eclipse of the fisticuffs.
2. The astronomer was moonstruck when he missed the eclipse. He was totally eclipsed with disappointment.
3. The eclipse was sponsored by Moonstruck Chocolate. It was a total chocolate eclipse of the sun.
4. I tried to make an eclipse pun but it was too corny. Don’t worry, it’ll come to me eventually.
5. Did you hear about the astronomer who chased the eclipse? He ran to catch a falling star.
6. I wanted to watch the eclipse but I mist my opportunity.
7. The total solar eclipse was a breathtaking sight. It left us completely star struck.
8. My friend got excited for the eclipse and bought eclipse-themed clothes. But it turned out to be a total fashion eclipse.
9. The excited astronomer prepared months in advance for the solar eclipse. It was his chance to shine.
10. I’m upset I missed the last eclipse. I hope I get an eclipse do-over.
11. Don’t stare at an eclipse too long. It can leave you feeling a little bit lightheaded.
12. I thought about telling an eclipse joke but decided to keep it low key.
13. The astronomer was determined to photograph the eclipse. He was hell-bent on a solar mission.
14. The total solar eclipse provided rare opportunities for the scientists. They were over the moon about it.
15. My friend got so excited about the eclipse, she booked a flight to see it. I told her she was totally eclipsing her good judgement.
16. I wanted to watch the eclipse but I couldn’t see anything! I was in the dark about the whole thing.
17. Make sure you never watch an eclipse alone. You don’t want to be left in the dark afterwards.
18. Did you hear about the eclipse that was sponsored by Ray-Ban sunglasses? It was a total Ray-Ban eclipse of the sun.
19. I’m so mad I forgot my eclipse glasses. My head is still spinning thinking about it.
20. I was going to tell a joke about the eclipse, but I think it’s too predictable and corny.
21. The excited eclipse watcher set his alarm to wake up early. He was determined to rise and moonshine.
22. My friend got so excited about the eclipse, he camped out a week early to get the best view. I told him he was totally off his moon rocker.
23. I wanted to watch the lunar eclipse but I got my phases mixed up. Boy was I red-faced afterwards.
24. Did you hear about the astronomer who wore two pairs of eclipse glasses? He wanted to be sunsationaly prepared.
25. I was going to make an eclipse joke, but decided to keep it low-key.
Eclipse One-Liners (25)
26. Don’t stare at an eclipse too long, it can leave you feeling completely moonstruck afterwards.
27. Solar eclipses are only exciting if you see the sun’s corona… No Corona, no fun!
28. Be careful not to eclipse your good judgement when chasing solar eclipses.
29. The excited eclipse watcher was determined to be bright-eyed and bushy tailed for the big event.
30. If you forget your eclipse glasses, you may cause permanent retinaeclipse damage.
31. The eclipse was breathtaking…It left us completely moonstruck and discombobulated.
32. Don’t let cloudy weather ruin your eclipse experience…Just dim the lights and play Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon.
33. Solar eclipses are only exciting if you see the sun’s corona…No Corona, no fun!
34. Be careful not to eclipse your good judgement when chasing solar eclipses.
35. I wanted to watch the lunar eclipse but I got my phases mixed up…Boy was I red-faced afterwards!
36. The excited eclipse watcher set his alarm to wake up early…He was determined to rise and moonshine.
37. My friend got so excited about the eclipse, he camped out a week early to get the best view…I told him he was totally off his moon rocker.
38. Did you hear about the astronomer who wore two pairs of eclipse glasses? He wanted to be sunsationaly prepared.
39. I heard two astronomers got into a fight during the eclipse…it was an eclipse of the fisticuffs.
40. Don’t let cloudy weather ruin your eclipse experience…just dim the lights and play Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon.
41. I wanted to watch the total solar eclipse but I mist my opportunity.
42. Make sure you never watch an eclipse alone…You don’t want to be left in the dark afterwards.
43. The astronomer was determined to photograph the eclipse…He was hell-bent on a solar mission.
44. The eclipse was breathtaking…It left us completely moonstruck and discombobulated.
45. The astronomer prepared months in advance for the solar eclipse…It was his chance to shine.
46. I tried to make an eclipse pun but it was too corny…Don’t worry, it’ll come to me eventually.
47. The total solar eclipse provided rare opportunities for scientists…They were over the moon about it.
48. My friend got eclipse-themed clothes but it turned out to be a total fashion eclipse.
49. I wanted to watch the lunar eclipse but got my phases mixed up…Boy was I red-faced afterwards!
50. The excited eclipse watcher set his alarm to wake up early…He was determined to rise and moonshine.
Best Eclipse Jokes (25)
51. I was really looking forward to the eclipse, but I forgot my protective eclipse glasses. My optometrist told me I suffered severe retinaeclipse damage.
52. Did you hear about the eclipse chaser who traveled all over the world to see a total solar eclipse? He was completely obsessed, his family staged an eclipse-intervention to block him from going overboard.
53. I accidentally looked up at the sun during the eclipse and my vision went dark. On the bright side, at least I got a nice tan on my retinas.
54. I was hoping to see the total eclipse of the sun, but I missed it because I got the time zone wrong. My astronomy career was eclipsed that day.
55. I got so excited about the eclipse that I drunk-ordered $500 worth of eclipse merchandise online. Let’s just say it resulted in a total financial eclipse.
56. Did you hear about the hipster who wouldn’t shut up about the eclipse? He saw it before it was cool.
57. I was going to make an eclipse joke, but then I realized it was too predictable and corny. Plus none of my friends care about astronomy puns anyway.
58. I traveled 2000 miles to see the total solar eclipse, but when the big moment came, it was too cloudy to see anything. Talk about an anticlimactic eclipse!
59. My friend got so hyped about watching the eclipse that he burned his retinas by staring at the sun too long. Safe to say he was totally blinded by the excitement.
60. Did you hear about the astronomer who chased eclipses all over the world? He was completely obsessed with catching them all – gotta eclipse ’em all!
61. I was hoping to see the total lunar eclipse, but I got my phases mixed up and missed the whole thing. Just call me Captain Clueless Eclipse Chaser.
62. I made the mistake of looking directly at the sun during the eclipse without glasses. My optometrist says I now have a permanent crescent shape burned into my retina.
63. Did you hear about the hipster who traveled 2000 miles to see the solar eclipse? He said he saw it before it was cool.
64. I wanted the perfect eclipse photo, so I stared directly at the sun for a minute. Ended up with a nice crescent shape burned into my eyes. #NoRegrets
65. My friend bought 20 pairs of paper eclipse glasses to resell them at a huge markup. Turns out it was a scam and none of them worked. Talk about a shady eclipse!
66. Did you hear about the eclipse chaser who spent $10,000 to fly around the world catching eclipses? His wife left him because she was tired of being eclipsed from his life.
67. I thought I could get a quick glimpse of the eclipse without glasses. My optometrist later told me I had UV keratoconjunctivitis and permanent retina damage.
68. I got so excited about photographing the eclipse that I tripped over my camera and smashed the lens. Nothing like a total camera eclipse!
69. I traveled 1500 miles to see the total solar eclipse, only to get stuck in traffic and miss the whole thing by 5 minutes. I was eclipse-tra disappointed!
70. Did you hear about the astronomer who traveled the world chasing eclipses, only to get stuck behind clouds/rain every time? Talk about bad lunar luck!
71. I forgot my protective eclipse glasses but was able to rig up a last minute alternative with a colander and some duct tape. I may have looked ridiculous but my eyes were stylishly eclipsed.
72. I was hoping to see the total lunar eclipse but I got the date wrong and stayed up all night staring at the moon for nothing. Just call me Captain Clueless Moon Gazer.
73. Did you hear about the guy who stared at the sun during the entire eclipse? He got a wicked tan on the back of his eyeballs.
74. I got confused and ended up buying 20 pairs of eclipse glasses for my dog. He looked fabulous in sunglasses but I lost my chance to see the eclipse.
75. The excited astronomer traveled 2000 miles to see the total solar eclipse, only to get clouded out at the last minute. Talk about a total bummer eclipse!
