Rectangle Puns
1. What do you call a four-sided shape that loves to party? A wrecked-angle!
2. Why was the rectangle angry at its friend? Because it was two-faced!
3. My friend got trapped inside a rectangle. Now they’re in a square predicament.
4. The band was looking for a new lead singer. They decided to hold a-rectangle-itions.
5. I tried to cut my pizza into a perfect rectangle but achieved mediocre results. You could say it was a so-so slice.
6. The rectangle was feeling blue so its friend took it to the movies to cheer it up. It worked like a charm.
7. What do you call a four-sided shape that wanders off? A stray-tangle!
8. Why should you never trust a rectangle? They tend to give you the runaround.
9. My rectangle friend is quite unstable and has a habit of flipping out. They really need to get a grip.
10. I saw two rectangles in an argument today. It seemed like quite the square off.
11. Why was the rhombus jealous of the rectangle? It really wanted to be a parallelogram!
12. The rectangle was feeling overwhelmed with life. It just needed time to recuperate.
Rectangle One-Liners
13. I tried to cut the cake into a perfect rectangle but it ended up being a little off-center.
14. My friend thinks he’s so edgy but he’s just another rectangle.
15. I ordered a rectangular coffee table but it arrived as a square – the delivery really missed the mark.
16. I was hoping my pizza would be cut into neat rectangle slices but the chef obviously doesn’t believe in right angles.
17. My backyard is a nice rectangle shape which makes mowing the lawn so much easier.
18. The picture frame was supposed to be a standard rectangle but the corners are rather skewed.
19. I tried folding the paper into a rectangle but one side is longer than the other.
20. My friend thinks he’s a real square but he’s just another boring rectangle like the rest of us.
21. I ordered rectangle curtains but they sent me square ones instead – it’s just not a good fit for my windows.
22. The wrapping paper claimed to have rectangles on it but they look more like uneven quadrilaterals to me.
Best Rectangle Jokes
23. I was out shopping for some new clothes over the weekend. While trying on pants, I overheard a guy in the next fitting room saying “These rectangles don’t fit me at all!” I assumed he meant the pants, but part of me wondered if he was just surrounded by shapes in there.
24. My son came home from school upset one day. When I asked what was wrong, he told me all the other kids were making fun of him for having a rectangle lunch box. Apparently only the cool kids have square ones. I tried to explain to him that rectangles can be cool too, but he was inconsolable. Poor kid was really getting boxed in over the shape of his lunch box.
25. I recently adopted a rescue rectangle. The poor thing was left abandoned outside a geometry factory. I felt so bad for the little guy, taking him home was a no-brainer. I was worried he might have some behavioral issues at first, but it turns out he’s right-angled!
26. Did you hear about the rectangle who was arrested for pretending to be a square? He was charged with impersonating an officer.
27. My friend just got back from the eye doctor and was quite upset. The doctor told him he has a-stigmatism. I tried to reassure him it wasn’t that bad, he doesn’t have a-rectangleism after all!
28. Why don’t rectangles like fast food? They prefer well-rounded meals.
29. Why was the rectangle crying? It made a bad parallelogram choice.
30. I saw an online ad for “rectangle-shaped watermelons.” Intrigued, I clicked on it only to find it was a total scam. The melons were just squares – false advertising at its finest!
31. What do you call a four-sided polygon that works as a farmhand? A rectangular prism.
32. Why do rectangles make such great spies? They’re expert shape-shifters.
33. My rectangle friend got dumped recently. He’s been moping around ever since, just going off on random tangents.
34. A rectangle walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says “I’m sorry, we don’t serve minors here.”
35. What do you call a four-sided figure with anxiety? A nervous wreck-tangle.
36. How did the rectangle know what time to show up for his date? He didn’t want to be a-cutie.
37. Why did the hipster rectangle refuse to conform to societal standards? It didn’t want to be boxed in.
38. What’s a rectangle’s favorite kind of music? Hip-hop!
39. Why do rectangles make great therapists? They’re excellent at being well-rounded.
40. My rectangle friend seems distant lately. I guess he’s just going through a bit of an oblique phase.
41. Ever since my rectangle started his new workout routine, he’s become an absolute quadrilateral.
42. Why was the quadrilateral embarrassed to be seen with the rectangle? It didn’t want to be associated with such a square.
43. Two rectangles walk into a bar. The first rectangle orders a beer, but the second rectangle is underage and gets asked to leave. The bartender should have card-ed him.
44. What do you call a four-sided figure who loves telling dad jokes? A rec-DANG-gle.
45. Why did the rectangle break up with his girlfriend? He found out she was A-CUTE one.