Cookie Puns (10)
1. What do you call an angry biscuit? A shortbread with attitude.
2. Why was the cookie so sad? It just crumbled.
3. What do you call a soaked cookie? A moist treat.
4. Why did the cookie visit the doctor? It was feeling crumby.
5. How do cookies get in shape? They use cookie cutters.
6. Why did the cookie cry? Its mother had been a wafer so long.
7. What do you call a cookie that goes thrifting? A crumby chic.
8. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the cookie jar? Supplies!
9. Why do cookies make great archers? They have lots of choco-chip experience.
10. Why do cookies make the best gardeners? They know how to lay chocolate chips.
Cookie One-Liners (10)
11. I ate too many chocolate chip cookies and now my clothes don’t fit. There’s only one thing cookie dough can’t fix.
12. I tried making my own Oreos but they came out tasting like cardboard. Guess I need more practice cookie-ing.
13. They say you can’t buy happiness but you can buy cookies, which is basically the same thing.
14. I was going to make snickerdoodles but I ate all the dough before it made it to the oven. No regrets.
15. You know when you dunk an Oreo too long and it falls apart as you lift it up? Yeah, I can relate.
16. Sugar cookies are just an excuse to eat raw cookie dough with no judgment.
17. Forget diamonds, cookies are a girl’s best friend!
18. I’m pretty sure chocolate chip cookies qualify as a food group.
19. I never met a cookie I didn’t like.
20. Cookies before bros.
Best Cookie Jokes (30)
21. What did the cookie say when it was feeling down? I’m crumbling under all this pressure!
22. Why was the chocolate chip sad? Its mother had been a wafer so long.
23. What do you call an overweight cookie? A heavy choc-o-late.
24. Why do cookies cry? Because their mother’s a wafer so long.
25. Why was the cookie expelled from school? It was caught dunkin’ donuts.
26. What happened when the chocolate chip met the cookie? It was loaf at first bite!
27. Why do cookies make great detectives? They always get to the crumb of every case.
28. How does a cookie get to work? It takes the cookie bus!
29. Why don’t eggs tell cookie jokes? They’d crack each other up!
30. What’s a cookie’s favorite style of karate? Choco-chip-chopo!
31. Why did the cookie visit the doctor? Because it was feeling crumby.
32. How does a cookie stop gossip? It crumbles the rumor.
33. What kind of keys do cookies open? Macademia nuts!
34. Why did the cookie put on sunscreen? It didn’t want to be a hot crossed bun!
35. Why couldn’t the cookie be a comedian? Its jokes were too corny!
36. Why was the cookie sad on Valentine’s Day? It couldn’t find its sweet tart!
37. How do cookies stay connected? Through their own private Wi-Fry!
38. Why was the cookie missing? All that was left were some crumbs to go by.
39. How does a cookie propose? With an engage-mint ring!
40. Why did the cookie think it was so cool? It was such a chocolate chip off the old block!
41. Why was the cookie being questioned by police? It was a suspect in a crumb-inal investigation!
42. Why was the cookie upset? It had a chip on its shoulder.
43. Why was the cookie sick? It was feeling a little crumby.
44. What did one cookie say to the other? I’m really craving a glass of milk!
45. Why was the gingerbread man the most popular guy in town? He was a real snack!
46. How do you fix a broken chocolate chip cookie? With cookie dough!
47. Why did the cookie cross the road? To get to the cookie party!
48. Why couldn’t the chocolate chip focus? It had its mind in other places.
49. Why did the cookie have trust issues? Someone took a bite out of it.
50. Why are cookies so good at keeping secrets? They know how to crumble information.
