Blow Up Doll Puns
1. I bought my girlfriend a blow up doll for her birthday. You could say she was in-flated with joy!
2. My friend got arrested for stealing blow up dolls. I guess he just couldn’t keep his hands to him-self.
3. I told my wife I bought a blow up doll to keep me company while she was away. She said, “You better not be cheetah on me!”
4. Did you hear about the blow up doll that was let down? She felt totally de-flated.
5. I saw a blow up doll in a beauty pageant. She was absolutely stun-ning.
6. Why did the blow up doll cross the road? To get to the other side!
7. What do you call a blow up doll that likes math? A cal-cue-later.
8. My blow up doll is studying to become a doctor. I’m so proud of my in-flate-able friend.
9. I took my blow up doll to get her nails done. The manicurist said, “I plastic see you brought your own client today!”
10. What do you call a blow up doll that works at a restaurant? A server!
Blow Up Doll One-Liners
11. My blow up doll is so life-like…until she starts to sag a bit.
12. Blow up dolls – for men who like a little less conversation.
13. Roses are red, violets are blue, I like plastic girls, how about you?
14. They say love is give and take, with a blow up doll it’s just blow and blow.
15. Blow up dolls – like a real woman without all the headaches.
16. I asked my blow up doll what she wanted for dinner. Turns out she was stuffed.
17. My blow up doll? We have an in-flat-able relationship.
18. Blow up dolls don’t complain when you leave the toilet seat up.
19. I caught my blow up doll cheating on me. I guess you could say she was a real back-stabbing witch.
20. Blow up dolls – for the man who always wanted big breasts he could actually lift.
Best Blow Up Doll Jokes
21. I came home to find my roommate blowing up his new girlfriend. I said “Dude, I think she’s full…” He said “No way man, look she’s still got a little sag!”
22. My buddy just got out of a nasty divorce. I got him a blow up doll to help him get back out there. He dresses her up, takes her out to dinner… I think it’s getting weird but he says she’s a great listener.
23. I was on a first date and the girl asked me “So do you have any weird hobbies?” I said “Well I do collect blow up dolls…” Her eyes got wide and she started to scoot away from the table. I quickly added “You know, for the pool!” She didn’t seem convinced.
24. I was at a party last night and saw a really hot girl, so I went up and tried flirting with her. Turns out she was just a realistic blow up doll some dude brought as his date. Man was my face red, although not as red as the guy’s when I asked him where he bought her.
25. So I’m on a crowded subway and this guy gets on with a blow up doll tucked under his arm. People start giving him weird looks but he just stands there casually holding onto the pole. After a few stops the doll starts slowly deflating and sinking towards the floor. This one old lady shakes her head and says “Well it looks like your date is too pooped to pop!”
26. I broke up with my girlfriend recently but didn’t want to be alone. My buddy suggested I buy a blow up doll for companionship. I took his advice and went to the adult store, picked out a nice doll and brought her home. We’ve been having a great time together! I dressed her up, took her out to a romantic dinner, even introduced her to my parents. They think I’ve lost it, but I think I’m onto something here. Who needs real women with all their needs when a blow up doll will fulfill your every desire without complaint! I think this could be the start of a beautiful relationship.
27. Why do men like blow up dolls so much? Because they blow up with just a couple pumps and never let you down!
28. My girlfriend said if I got one more blow up doll she was leaving me. So I got another blow up doll to help carry her stuff out the door.
29. I told my wife I was buying a blow up doll because I was going through some things and just needed something to cuddle with at night. Apparently “going through some things” wasn’t a good enough excuse.
30. My neighbors were complaining about the blow up dolls in my yard, saying it was lowering property values. So I took them down and now the neighborhood just looks empty and sad. You just can’t please some people.
31. They say you should never go to bed angry. But with my blow up doll, going to bed angry is the only option.
32. I was feeling lonely so I got a blow up doll to keep me company. We were having a nice dinner but she just wouldn’t shut up about her day. Always complaining and nagging me. I may need to trade her in for a newer model.
33. I caught my blow up doll cheating on me with another man! She tried to deny it but I saw the evidence when I flipped her over. The tramp had let him sign his name right on her butt with a Sharpie. I gave her the boot right then and there!
34. My blow up doll wasn’t feeling well so I took her to the doctor. After examining her, the doc said “Looks like your girlfriend here just has a bad case of de-flation.” He patched her up and she was good as new!
35. My girlfriend wasn’t too happy when she found the blow up doll in the closet. I told her to think of it like a pool toy so we could have more fun together. Let’s just say that explanation didn’t float her boat.
36. I was at a party last night and met this gorgeous woman, we really hit it off. After a few drinks I asked her if she wanted to get out of there and she said yes! So we went back to my place and things started heating up pretty quickly. But when I leaned in for a kiss she just fell over – turns out my perfect woman was just a blow up doll someone had brought as a prank. Talk about a deflating experience.
37. I went to visit my uncle and noticed he had a blow up doll sitting on the couch. I asked him what that was all about. He said, “I got tired of having no one to talk to around here, so I bought Betty-Sue to keep me company. She’s a great conversationalist!” I just nodded and backed away slowly.
38. I was trying to propose to my girlfriend but was so nervous I blew it. Literally – I accidentally popped the ring box open right in her face. That blew up in my face even faster than my prize inflatable girlfriend!
39. Why are blow up dolls so happy? Because they’re full of hot air!
40. What did the blow up doll get on her SATs? High scores! Because she has a lot of plasticity intelligence.
41. Why don’t blow up dolls ever go broke? Because they always have at least one pump!
42. What do you get if you cross a blow up doll with a chicken? A hen-flatable!
43. What do you call a doll who always repays her debts? An in-flatable!
44. Why did the inflatable girl break up with her boyfriend? She was tired of getting deflated.
45. I told my inflatable doll to stop pretending she’s an airline stewardess. She needs to stop this flight of fantasy!