Zoo Puns
1. What do you call a sleepy zookeeper? A zoo-nooze!
2. Why are frogs so happy at the zoo? They enjoy being in a hopitat!
3. How do zookeepers organize a party? They plan-it very carefully!
4. Why was the little gorilla crying? Because his mommy and daddy were monkeying around!
5. What’s a zookeeper’s favorite soda? Panda Pop!
6. How do lions greet each other at the zoo? Paws-itively!
7. Why do zebras have stripes? Because they don’t want to be spotted!
8. Why don’t anteaters get sick? They’re full of ant-i-bodies!
9. What do you call a fun zookeeper? A zany zoo-keeper!
10. What’s a monkey’s favorite snack? Chimp cookies!
11. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
12. Why did the lion stop roaring? He ran out of voice!
13. What do you call a funny gorilla? A pun-dilla!
14. What did the baby zebra say when it saw its first stripes? “Momma, I’m stuburned!”
15. Why was the leopard smiling? Because it was having a cheetah day!
Zoo One-Liners
16. The zookeepers named the baby skunk Stinker because he was absolutely adorable.
17. The new snake exhibit was an epic hiss-tory lesson for all the kids.
18. The parrots were squawking so loudly it sounded like a jungle jam in there.
19. The penguins were ready to par-tay as they slid into the pool.
20. Thecamels were not at all impressed with their newly renovated habitat.
21. The zoo almost had to replace the glass in the howler monkey enclosure.
22. The otters could not stop giggling and frolicking in their pond.
23. The baby elephant was an adorable little guy, always following his mama around.
24. The zoo chef made a special treat for the seals – sardines on ice!
25. The tigers were especially playful today, wrestling each other in their den.
Best Zoo Jokes
26. A man was visiting the zoo when he decided to strike up a conversation with the gorilla. He noticed the gorilla was holding a small green ball in his hand. “Hey buddy,” the man said, “what’s with the bright green ball there?”
The gorilla stared at him for a moment and then signed back, “That’s food.” The man nodded slowly and continued, “Oh I see, food huh? Well why are you holding it like that?”
Again the gorilla took a moment to respond and then signed back, “It’s a kiwi fruit.”
27. A zookeeper brought her young daughter to work with her one day. As they were passing by the elephant enclosure, the daughter pointed and exclaimed, “Mommy, that elephant has four legs in front and two in back! Why is that?”
The zookeeper explained, “Well sweetie, the elephant has four legs in front so it can reach and pick up a lot of food. And it has two legs in back so it can kick the heck out of anything that sneaks up behind it!”
The daughter thought for a moment and replied, “So it’s a two-wheel-drive animal!”
28. What do you call bears with no ears? B!
29. A zookeeper and a lawyer were walking next to the elephant enclosure when all of a sudden, they slip and fall in! A nearby lion sees this happen and races over. Just as it leaps to attack them, the lawyer cries out, “Help, help, the lion’s going to eat us!” The zookeeper responds, “Shut up, you fool, he’s not going to eat us. Lions are big cats and cats don’t eat lawyers out of professional courtesy.”
30. A man walked into a zoo exhibit and fell into the crocodile pit. He began to panic as the crocodiles surrounded him, but then one swam up to him. It asked, “Do you need help getting out?” The man couldn’t believe it! “Y-yes please!” he stammered. “Okay, I’ll help you, but first you have to promise not to sue the zoo.” The man agreed and the crocodile helped him climb out of the pit. When the man turned to thank the crocodile, it snapped at him with lightning speed jaw. The man screamed “I thought you said you’d help me! Why did you do that?” The crocodile grinned and said “I’m just a croc.”
31. Why don’t tigers like fast food? They don’t like fast food, they’d rather have a cheetah burger.
32. Did you hear about the overweight polar bear? He could barely catch his breath mint.
33. What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an octopus? Some pretty dang good boxing.
34. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
35. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
36. What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me tonight.
37. How does NASA organize their company parties? They planet.
38. Why can’t bicycles stand up on their own? They’re two tired.
39. Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
40. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
41. What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
42. What do you call a funny mountain? Hill-arious.
43. Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe!
44. What award did the dentist receive? The plaque.
45. How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.
46. What do you call a magician on a plane? A flying sorcerer!
47. Why can’t a bicycle stand up on its own? It’s two tired.
