I asked my socks why they were fighting. They said it was because they didn’t get along.
My socks told me to stop walking all over them. I guess they were feeling down-trodden.
I entered my socks in a race. Unfortunately, they ended up getting disqualified for illegal use of perforations.
I told my socks a chemistry joke, but there was no reaction. I guess they found it boron.
Did you hear about the socks that liked to gossip? They were known to spread rumors from sole to sole.
I asked my socks what time of day it was. The ankle sock said it was a quarter to five, while the crew sock claimed it was half past twelve. I guess their answers were a bit foot-ish.
Why can’t socks keep secrets? Because they always end up getting cold feet.
What did one sock say to the sock that owed it money? You better cough up the dough!
Why do socks make bad TV reporters? Because they have a habit of rushing in without checking their sources.
Did you hear about the sock that was addicted to the internet? It just couldn’t log off.
Did you hear about the socks that got jobs as lawyers? People say they have an amazing grasp of the legal briefs.
Why didn’t the sock want to travel abroad? It already had more than enough foreign threads.
My sock tried to be an astronaut but NASA said no. I guess they have pretty high standards when it comes to the Space Foot race.
I told my socks to stop slacking off and get to work. They just loafed around even more.
Did you hear about the socks that eloped? Their parents were completely shocked.
What do you call a sock in denial? A hypocrite.
My socks threw a surprise party for my shoes. It was very touching to see them bond over footwear.
What do you call socks that meditate? Holy soles!
Did you hear two socks got married? The ceremony was beautiful but the reception was holey.
Socks One-Liners (15)
I asked my socks why they were fighting, they said it was because they didn’t get along.
My socks told me to stop walking all over them, they were feeling down-trodden.
I entered my socks in a race, unfortunately they got disqualified for illegal perforations.
Told my socks a chemistry joke, no reaction though, they found it boron.
Did you hear about the gossipy socks spreading rumors from sole to sole?
Asked my socks the time, their answers were a bit foot-ish though.
Socks can’t keep secrets, they always get cold feet.
What do you call a sock that owes you money? Cough it up!
Why do socks make bad reporters? Rush in without sources.
Did you hear about the sock addicted to the internet? Can’t log off.
Did you hear about the lawyer socks? Grasp of legal briefs.
My sock didn’t travel, it already had foreign threads.
NASA has high space foot race standards.
Told my socks to work, they just loafed around more.
The shocked parents when socks eloped.
Best Socks Jokes (24)
I was running late for work when I realized I had odd socks on. People will think I’m a fashion victim, but the truth is I was a dressing casualty.
My friend was bragging about how organized his sock drawer was. I told him to get a life and stop taking things for granted.
I entered my talking socks in the school talent show. They failed miserably though – I guess they’re only used to sock puppets.
Did you hear about the socks who did stand up comedy? They absolutely killed despite having no sense of humor. Everyone said their delivery was brilliant.
My socks and I were not on speaking terms because I refused to apologize for wearing shoes without them. After a week of silence, they finally reached out, saying we need to address the elephant in the room.
I accidentally wore two left socks today. Having two rights would have been more correct.
What did one saggy sock say to the other saggy sock? If we don’t get support soon, people are going to think we’re down in the heels.
My socks wrote me a song to apologize for smelling so bad. When I heard them sing I almost fainted again.
I told my favorite socks that we make a perfect pair. “Don’t be silly,” they laughed. “We’re sole mates!”
What do you call a fortune telling sock? A prophe-sole!
Did you hear about the socks who couldn’t stop partying? They had to check into re-sock-habilitation.
My socks threw a big party while I was out and trashed the laundry room. Now they’re all grounded.
What did one saggy sock say to the other saggy sock? If we don’t get support soon, people are going to think we’re down in the heels.
I told my favorite socks that we make a perfect pair. “Don’t be silly,” they laughed. “We’re sole mates!”
Did you hear about the socks who couldn’t stop partying? They had to check into re-sock-habilitation.
My socks wrote me a song to apologize for smelling so bad. When I heard them sing I almost fainted again.
I accidentally wore two left socks today. Having two rights would have been more correct.
What did one saggy sock say to the other saggy sock? If we don’t get support soon, people are going to think we’re down in the heels.
My socks threw a big party while I was out and trashed the laundry room. Now they’re all grounded.
What do you call a fortune telling sock? A prophe-sole!
I told my favorite socks that we make a perfect pair. “Don’t be silly,” they laughed. “We’re sole mates!”
Did you hear about the socks who couldn’t stop partying? They had to check into re-sock-habilitation.
