Pretzel Puns
1. Why don’t pretzels get married? They have too much salt in their relationships!
2. What do you call a pretzel that works out? A muscle knot.
3. Why was the pretzel late to work? It took too long to twist and turn in traffic.
4. Why do pretzels make bad gardeners? They have twisted roots.
5. What do you call a pretzel that’s had too much sun? A tanned knot.
6. How does a pretzel relax after work? It unwinds with a twist.
7. Why couldn’t the pretzel finish the marathon? It hit the wall at mile 20.
8. What do you call a pretzel that just came back from the spa? A re-twisted knot.
9. Why are pretzels never lonely? They always have company – they come in twos!
10. What do you call two pretzels in love? A twisting couple.
11. How does a pretzel know it put on too much weight? Its knotch gets tighter.
Pretzel One-Liners
12. I tried doing yoga like a pretzel…I got all bent out of shape.
13. They say you are what you eat – no wonder I’m so twisted!
14. I’m training for the Olympics in pretzel twisting.
15. Be the pretzel you wish to see in the world.
16. Pretzels: proof that tangled can be delicious.
17. I’ve got 99 problems but a pretzel ain’t one.
18. Pretzels – knot your average snack.
19. Once you pop, you can’t pretzel stop.
20. Keep calm and pretzel on.
21. You had me at pretzel.
Best Pretzel Jokes
22. A man walked into a pretzel shop. The owner said “Welcome to the knotty bar!”
23. What did the pretzel say when it was put in the oven? “I’m getting hot under the collar!”
24. Why don’t sharks eat pretzels? They don’t like getting salt water in their mouths.
25. What kind of shoes do pretzels wear? Loafers.
26. How do pretzels get in shape? They crunch and twist.
27. Why did the pretzel win the Nobel Prize? It had a twisted brilliant mind.
28. What do you call a sleepy pretzel? A drowsy knot.
29. Why don’t birds eat pretzels? Because they get bread not knotted.
30. Why was the pretzel teacher annoyed? Her students were knotty boys and girls who didn’t follow instructions.
31. How did the pretzel propose to his girlfriend? He got down on one knee and said “I knead you in my life.”
32. What did the pirate say when he found a pretzel in his treasure chest? “It’s a knot I was expecting.”
33. Why are pretzels the most eco-friendly snacks? They always recycle themselves through twists and loops.
34. What happens when a pretzel gets overheated? It has a melt down.
35. Why did the pretzel’s girlfriend break up with him? He was too salty.
36. What do you get when you cross a pretzel with a tangled hose? A twisted mess.
