Pee Wee Herman Puns
1. I heard Pee Wee Herman got a job at the post office. He really delivers the mail!
2. Did you hear about Pee Wee Herman’s new dance studio? It’s for people with two left feet!
3. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman like taking pictures? He always ends up looking funny!
4. I was watching Pee Wee’s Playhouse the other day and thought, this show is chair-y great!
5. Pee Wee Herman should open a bakery, he’s so good at pies and cakes.
6. Pee Wee Herman tried to steal a boat but it sank. I guess crime doesn’t really pay!
7. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman become a judge? He has trouble making fair rulings!
8. I heard Pee Wee Herman’s favorite flower is the dandelion. I guess he just likes weeds!
9. Did you hear about Pee Wee Herman’s brief stunt as a magician? All his tricks were sleight of hand!
10. I bet if Pee Wee Herman went camping, he’d pitch tents really well.
11. Why does Pee Wee Herman make a great hotel clerk? He’s an expert at concierge service!
12. Pee Wee Herman tried to become an electrician but he had no spark for the job.
13. I heard Pee Wee Herman wants to be a pilot. That would be plane crazy!
14. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman work in construction? He’s no good at building things up.
15. Did you hear Pee Wee Herman’s car broke down? I guess he needs to call for some auto service.
16. I bet if Pee Wee Herman became a gardener, he’d be great at planting seeds of ideas.
17. Why did Pee Wee Herman get fired from the calendar factory? He took too many days off!
18. Did you hear Pee Wee Herman opened a shoe store? Apparently all his sales have fallen flat.
19. I heard Pee Wee Herman tried to be a barber but he wasn’t cut out for the job.
20. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman work in carpentry? He’s no good at woodwork.
Pee Wee Herman One-Liners
21. Pee Wee Herman walks into a bar. The bartender says “Why the grey suit?”
22. What do you call Pee Wee Herman with half a brain? Gifted!
23. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but then it hit me.
24. Did you hear about the guy who stole Pee Wee Herman’s journal? He really wanted to get inside Pee Wee’s big adventure.
25. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman go fishing? He doesn’t like being hooked!
26. What do you call Pee Wee Herman in a war zone? A target!
27. Why does Pee Wee Herman make a great basketball player? He’s an expert dribbler.
28. I told Pee Wee Herman to be himself. That was clearly bad advice.
29. What do you call Pee Wee Herman with no arms and no legs floating in water? Bob.
30. Why can’t you hear Pee Wee Herman using the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent.
31. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman donate blood? He faints at the sight of plasma!
32. I’m reading a book on the history of glue. It’s very hard to put down.
33. Why did Pee Wee Herman get fired from the calendar factory? He took a day off!
34. If Pee Wee Herman was a doctor, he’d have a lot of patients. Get it? Patients!
35. What concert costs only 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!
36. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman go on cruise ships? He’d get seasick easily.
37. I told Pee Wee Herman to be himself today. Worst advice ever.
38. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman become an astronaut? He’s afraid of heights!
39. What do you call Pee Wee Herman on roller skates? A rolling stone.
40. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but then it hit me.
Best Pee Wee Herman Jokes
41. Pee Wee Herman walked into a bar and ordered a martini. The bartender asked, “Olive or twist?” Pee Wee replied, “Oh come on man, I’m just trying to get a drink here!”
42. Did you hear about the new Pee Wee Herman doll? It comes with two left feet! Apparently they’re targeting kids with no rhythm.
43. Why did Pee Wee Herman get fired from the calendar factory? Because he took a day off! His supervisor said “I told you what would happen if you took another day off.”
44. What do you call Pee Wee Herman with no arms and no legs lying on the beach? Sandy! He sure loves a day soaking up the sun at the shore.
45. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman donate blood? He faints at the sight of plasma! I guess he just can’t stomach the red liquid.
46. I told Pee Wee Herman to be himself today. That was clearly the worst advice ever. He started dancing on the tables at work and got fired shortly after.
47. Did you hear about the new Pee Wee Herman scented candle? It smells funny!
48. Why did Pee Wee Herman cross the road? To get to the other side! I know, hilarious right? The chicken joke but with Pee Wee Herman.
49. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but then it hit me. That frisbee throw Pee Wee Herman made really packed a punch!
50. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman become an astronaut? Because he’s afraid of heights! Looks like his dreams of space travel are grounded.
51. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman go on cruise ships? He’d get seasick easily. All that rocking and rolling doesn’t sit well with his stomach.
52. What do you call Pee Wee Herman with half a brain? Gifted! He may not be the sharpest tool in the shed but he makes the most of what little he has.
53. Did you hear about the guy who stole Pee Wee Herman’s journal? He really wanted to get inside Pee Wee’s big adventure! I guess he was hoping for some juicy secrets.
54. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman work in carpentry? He’s no good at woodwork. Unless it involves popsicle sticks and elmer’s glue, he’s lost.
55. What do you call Pee Wee Herman in a war zone? A target! His goofy get-up doesn’t exactly provide camouflage.
56. I heard Pee Wee Herman tried to be a barber but he wasn’t cut out for the job. All his clients kept asking for refunds on their terrible haircuts!
57. Did you hear about Pee Wee Herman’s dance studio? It’s for people with two left feet! He figures there’s a market for the rhythmically challenged.
58. Why does Pee Wee Herman make a great basketball player? He’s an expert dribbler. He can bounce that ball all day long.
59. What concert costs only 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback! Can you imagine Pee Wee Herman rocking out to them in concert?
60. I bet if Pee Wee Herman became a gardener, he’d be great at planting seeds of ideas. Although they’d probably be some pretty wacky ideas!
61. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman become a judge? He has trouble making fair rulings! Everything comes down to eeny meeny miny moe with him.
62. Did you hear Pee Wee Herman’s car broke down? I guess he needs to call for some auto service. Too bad he knows nothing about engines.
63. Why does Pee Wee Herman make a great hotel clerk? He’s an expert at concierge service! He’ll go above and beyond for hotel guests.
64. What do you call Pee Wee Herman on roller skates? A rolling stone! He goes skating by so fast you’ll barely recognize him.
65. I heard Pee Wee Herman wants to be a pilot. That would be plane crazy! Can you imagine him flying a 747?
66. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman become an astronaut? He’s afraid of heights! Looks like his dreams of space travel are grounded.
67. I told Pee Wee Herman to be himself today. That was clearly the worst advice ever. He started dancing on the tables at work and got fired shortly after.
68. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman donate blood? He faints at the sight of plasma! I guess he just can’t stomach the red liquid.
69. What do you call Pee Wee Herman in a war zone? A target! His goofy get-up doesn’t exactly provide camouflage.
70. Did you hear about the new Pee Wee Herman scented candle? It smells funny! I’m not sure what they were going for with that scent.
71. Why did Pee Wee Herman get fired from the calendar factory? Because he took a day off! His supervisor said “I told you what would happen if you took another day off.”
72. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman go fishing? He doesn’t like being hooked! The struggle of the catch is just too much for him.
73. What do you call Pee Wee Herman with no arms and no legs floating in water? Bob! He’s just bobbing along enjoying a nice summer swim.
74. I heard Pee Wee Herman tried to steal a boat but it sank. I guess crime doesn’t really pay! He’s not so smooth on the high seas.
75. Why does Pee Wee Herman make a great basketball player? He’s an expert dribbler. He can bounce that ball all day long.
76. I bet if Pee Wee Herman went camping, he’d pitch tents really well. He’s probably been camping since he was a little kid.
77. Did you hear Pee Wee Herman’s brief stint as a magician? All his tricks were sleight of hand! He needs to practice more before going pro.
78. Why doesn’t Pee Wee Herman like taking pictures? He always ends up looking funny! He can never manage to pose quite right.
79. I heard Pee Wee Herman wants to be a pilot. That would be plane crazy! Can you imagine him flying a 747?
80. What do you call Pee Wee Herman with half a brain? Gifted! He may not be the sharpest tool in the shed but he makes the most of what little he has.
81. Why can’t Pee Wee Herman work in construction? He’s no good at building things up. Unless it involves popsicle sticks and glue, he’s lost.
82. I heard Pee Wee Herman’s favorite flower is the dandelion. I guess he just likes weeds! He sees the beauty in those scrappy little flowers.
83. Why did Pee Wee Herman cross the road? To get to the other side! I know, hilarious right? The chicken joke but with Pee Wee Herman.
84. If Pee Wee Herman was a doctor, he’d have a lot of patients. Get it? Patients! He’s not known for being punctual.
85. Pee Wee Herman tried to become an electrician but he had no spark for the job. He just couldn’t get amped about wiring.
