Mirror Puns
1. I was going to buy a mirror but I decided against it. I don’t want to see myself in one.
2. My mirror and I have a complicated relationship. We see each other every day but we never talk.
3. I brought my mirror to the gym to get a good look at my form. Now I can see my reflection working out.
4. I was feeling lonely so I tried having a conversation with my mirror. It went okay but they kept talking back to me.
5. I entered my mirror into a beauty pageant. I knew it would win because it’s the most beautiful reflection of me.
6. My mirror and I decided to go our separate ways. I guess we just needed some space.
7. I got into an argument with my mirror today. They were being totally reflective and just repeating everything I said!
8. I’m thinking of replacing all my mirrors with windows. I’m just not that into looking at myself anymore.
9. I caught my mirror cheating on me with someone else. I saw them reflecting another person!
10. My mirror tried to give me advice but I didn’t listen. It was just too transparent.
11. I wanted to hang out with my mirror but they gave me the cold reflection.
12. My mirror and I decided to see other people. We agreed we’d still look out for each other and reflect on the good times.
Mirror One-Liners
13. I’m so ugly when I look in the mirror, it looks back and shakes its head.
14. My mirror image is so horrifying, I’m pretty sure that’s how Bloody Mary manifests.
15. I’m avoiding my mirror right now… it keeps showing ugly truths.
16. Don’t trust everything you see in a mirror, like me looking good in this outfit.
17. I checked my mirror for any imperfections. It said “where do I start?”
18. My mirror tried to give me a pep talk but I couldn’t get a word in edgewise.
19. My mirror called in sick today. It said it couldn’t face working.
20. I told my mirror it was time to reflect on our relationship. It told me to take a long look at myself first.
21. I asked my mirror who was the fairest of them all. It said “Snow White.”
22. I tried to sneak up on my mirror but it saw right through me.
Best Mirror Jokes
23. I was feeling insecure so I asked my mirror, “Am I ugly?” It said “I would prefer not to answer that.”
24. I was suspicious that my mirror was making me look heavier than I really am. So I weighed myself, then stepped on the scale while holding the mirror. Unfortunately, the mirror weighed nothing.
25. My mirror and I got into an argument about who should apologize first. That’s when I realized – I was talking to myself this whole time.
26. I entered my house of mirrors but I couldn’t find my way out. It was a reflection on my poor sense of direction.
27. I tried to sneak extra bottles of shampoo through airport security by taping them to my body under my clothes. But my plan was foiled when they made me stand in front of a full-body mirror.
28. I was feeling depressed so I started saying positive affirmations to my reflection in the mirror, like “you’re amazing!” and “you can do this!”. It perked me right up – I’m so motivational.
29. I hired a mirror as my life coach to give me advice. But every time I asked for feedback it just showed me myself, so I still don’t know what I’m doing wrong.
30. I entered myself into a lookalike contest against my mirror image. I ended up losing to myself.
31. I saw a sign at the carnival that said “House of Mirrors – No Refunds!” That’s false advertising, they gave me ten reflections.
32. I confessed my deepest secrets to the mirror. It reflected back my innermost thoughts and feelings, and for the first time I saw myself clearly. Also I should really clean it more, it’s getting gross.
33. I saw a creepy clown standing behind me in the mirror, so I spun around to face him. But when I turned there was no one there. Then I realized my reflection was just that ugly.
34. I asked the magic mirror who was the fairest of them all. “Well you have beauty but Snow White has inner beauty”. Hey, mirrors aren’t supposed to roast people!
35. My mirror tried to give me a pep talk since I was feeling bad about myself. But it turns out taking advice from my own reflection just made me feel worse.
36. I told my mirror we needed some time apart but I would still always look up to it.
37. Don’t trust everything you hear from a mirror. I said to mine “You’re so handsome!” It said back “Stop lying!”
38. Working with mirrors can be a very reflective profession.
39. If you’re lost in a house of mirrors, just remember to reflect before you act.
40. I entered a lookalike contest against my mirror. I lost but to be fair, we are identical.
41. I asked my mirror who was the smartest person in the world. It said “Albert Einstein” then called me a narcissist.
42. They say mirrors reflect your true self. So if I’m ugly on the outside I guess I gotta fix my inner beauty.
43. I’m suspicious that my mirror makes me look shorter than I really am. I measured myself, then stood in front of the mirror with a measuring tape. Unfortunately it was perfectly accurate.
44. My mirror keeps complementing me. I think it’s just trying to butter me up so I’ll forget how ugly I am.
45. I entered myself into a talent show against my mirror to see who the better dancer was. All the judges scores were perfectly split.