Karaoke Puns 1. I wanted to sing at karaoke night, but I didn’t have the vocals for it. 2. The karaoke machine had a malfunction and started playing songs in the wrong key. It was quite the lyric crisis. 3. I’m too shy to sing karaoke. I guess you could say I lack stage presence. …
Random Jokes
Elf Puns 1. What do you call an elf who just escaped from prison? A little con elf! 2. Why was the elf sent to detention? He got caught elfish-ing through another student’s backpack. 3. Why do elves work long hours making toys? They’re trying to work themselves down to the nub. 4. Why are …
Gym Puns (20) Don’t make fun of people at the gym. They’ve been working really cardia to get in shape. The gym instructor asked us to do more reps to failure. I failed right away. I had to stop going to my old gym. It had too many fees they were trying to squat on …
Biology Puns 1. I took my biology final last week and I think I nailed the fungi questions! My friend said she bombed it and was lichen herself to a foot fungus. 2. Our biology professor told us we needed to get more fiber in our diets. I told him we have plenty of mitochondria. …
Button Puns 1. I asked my tailor if he could make me some new shirts without buttons. He said, “That’s a seamless request!” 2. The little boy was frustrated trying to button up his shirt. I told him, “Don’t get upset, you’ll get the hang of it eventually.” 3. I entered my cat in a …
Avocado Puns (15) 1. What do you call an avocado that got away? A guaca-mole! 2. Why don’t avocados like to share? They’re guacward! 3. What’s an avocado’s favorite game show? The Price is Guac! 4. Why did the avocado cross the road? To get to the guac side! 5. How do you fix a …
Elephant Puns (10) What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? Irrelephant. Why do elephants have trunks? Because they’d look silly with suitcases. What’s an elephant’s favorite snack? Peanut butter and jellaphants. How do elephants get down from trees? They don’t, they get down from elephants. What do you give an elephant with big …
Lock Puns 1. I wanted to get a high-security lock for my house, but they’re just too ex-pen-sive! 2. My friend was an apprentice locksmith, but he kept making mistakes and ended up getting the boot. 3. I heard there’s going to be a big sale on locks next week. It will be absolutely unbolievable! …
Harry Potter Puns 1. I wanted to dress up like a Hogwarts student for Halloween, but I couldn’t find my Hogwarts robet. 2. The Weasley twins walk into a bar and order two butterbeers. The bartender asks, “Are you sure you’re old enough to drink?” One twin replies, “Yeah, we’re of wizarding age!” 3. Did …
Spoon Puns I only use spoons made of silver because I have expensive taste. My friend was bragging about his fancy spoon collection, but I told him not to stir up trouble. The superhero Spoon Man uses his exceptional stirring powers to mix up criminals. I entered a spoon decorating contest, but I didn’t win …