Lent Puns (30) What do you call a guy who gives up snacks for Lent? Abstinent. Why was the chocolate bar excited for Lent to be over? It wanted to be eaten again! I’m so hungry during Lent I could eat a horse. Actually, I would if the Catholic Church didn’t forbid it! My wife …
Random Jokes
Lettuce Puns 1. Lettuce turnip the beet! This silly pun definitely takes the cake when it comes to funny lettuce jokes. 2. What do you call a sad piece of lettuce? Blue-tuce! The color blue is often associated with sadness, making this pun funny and clever. 3. Why was the lettuce sitting by itself at …
Rabbit Puns 1. What do you call a three-legged rabbit? A hop-along. 2. Why was the rabbit so happy? It was having a hoppy day. 3. How do rabbits travel? By hareplane. 4. What do you call a happy rabbit? A hoppy bunny. 5. Why shouldn’t you tell a rabbit a secret? Because it might …
Plane Puns 1. I wanted to fly to Paris, but the plane got de-toured. 2. My friend is a pilot. He likes telling plane jokes that never seem to land. 3. Did you hear about the new restaurant called Plane Food? I hear their meals are pretty basic. 4. What do you call a plane …
Golf Puns 1. I went to the driving range to work on my golf swing. It was tee-riffic! 2. My friend was bragging that he could drive the ball 400 yards. I told him to stop with the fore play. 3. I entered a contest for the worst golf pun. I was hoping to win …
Poop Puns (10) 1. I’m feeling pretty crappy today. My stomach is in turdmoil. 2. The plumber was having a crappy day. All he wanted to do was drop the kids off at the pool, but he kept getting called for toilet emergencies. 3. I ate some bad Mexican food last night. Now I’m in …
Salad Puns 1. Lettuce turnip the beet on these salad puns! 2. Orange you glad I didn’t say banana? That would have been a fruitless salad pun. 3. What do you call a sad salad? Blue cheese. 4. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing! 5. What do you call a …
Physics Puns 1. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now. 2. A photon checks into a hotel and the bellhop asks him if he has any luggage. The photon replies “No, I’m traveling light.” 3. Did you hear about the bartender who was arrested for serving alcohol after hours? He said …
Ice Puns (15) 1. I went to a hockey game and got hit with a puck. Now I have an ice pack on my head! 2. I was going to make some iced tea but all the ice cubes melted. What a missed opportunity! 3. The ice cream truck driver quit his job because it …
May Puns Every May 1st, I get up with the day and show my enthusiasm. You could say I’m an early May person. I asked my friend if he wanted to celebrate May Day with me. He said, “Mayday! Mayday! Abort mission!” My wife told me not to drink too much at the May Day …