32 Jokes About Purple

Purple Puns (12)

1. What do you call an eggplant that ran a marathon? A plum pooped!
2. Why was the grape feeling blue? It was lacking a little red and had too much purple!
3. How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it!
4. What do you call a sleeping eggplant? An auber-gin!
5. How do you organize a space party? You planet!
6. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
7. What do you call cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!
8. Why couldn’t the berry go out on a date? It wasn’t ready to commit to an engage-mint!
9. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
10. Why did the pigments argue? They were having a color disagreement!
11. What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry!
12. Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing!

Purple One-Liners (10)

1. I ate so many purple plums, people started calling me Violet Beauregard!
2. Purple is just a fruit that identifies as a color.
3. Purple rain? More like grape juice falling from the sky.
4. Purple prose refers to overly descriptive writing; I prefer concise, plum writing instead.
5. The only thing better than a purple lightsaber is a grape-flavored lightsaber.
6. Purple is just a fancy word for violet – it thinks it’s so posh!
7. Purple Mountain’s Majesty? Clearly they’ve never seen the beautiful Grape Mountains!
8. Purple haze all in my brain, probably because I inhaled grape-flavored smoke.
9. I’m so grapeful to all the purple foods that add color to my diet!
10. Purple may be the color of royalty, but it tastes like grapes to me.

Best Purple Jokes (10)

1. What do you call a purple gorilla playing the drums? Grape Ape!

2. Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9! And 7 was purple.

3. What’s E.T. short for? Because he’s got little legs! And he was purple.

4. Why don’t eggs tell each other jokes? They’d crack each other up! Purple eggs tell the funniest yolks.

5. What happens to grapes at retirement? They get raisin! The purple grapes always complain about shriveling up.

6. How do you make an egg roll? You push it! But pushing purple eggs just makes them more oval shaped.

7. Why don’t melons get married? Because they cantaloupe! Purple melons are the most desperate for love.

8. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer. But if it’s purple, it’s a plum bull dozer!

9. What do you get when you cross a plum and a kiwi? A plumkiwi! It’s a strange purple hybrid fruit.

10. Why did the jellybean go to school? To become a smartie! The purple jellybean was the brainiest in the bunch.