Recycling Puns (15)
- I heard the city is opening a new recycling center. It sounds like it’s going to be a waste management facility.
- My friend got a job at the new recycling plant. He said it has its ups and downs, but the work is pretty garbage.
- Did you hear about the foreman at the recycling plant who kept demanding more out of his employees? He wanted them to work round the clock turning waste into renewed materials.
- The recycling company fired their laziest employee. His supervisor said he just wasn’t cutting down on waste.
- I applied for a job at the new recycling center, but they said I was over-qualified. I guess you could say I was too good to be remade.
- I entered my pet rabbit in a recycling competition. He won by a hare.
- When the city opened up bids for the new recycling contract, it caused quite the rubbish among contractors. They were trash talking each other over who would win it.
- The new recycling machines at the plant are state of the art. They really know how to take trash and turn it into treasure.
- My friend got a job sorting recycling. He’s making a decent wage and says the work isn’t too bad. He’s just happy to be wasting away again.
- The foreman at the recycling plant was caught embezzling funds. I guess he was skimming a little off the top trash.
- Working at the recycling plant seems like an endless cycle. Just when you think you’re finished, there’s more trash to process.
- The new recycling manager said he would turn this place around 360 degrees. I said, “Don’t you mean 180 degrees?” He said, “No, 360. We’re already recycling here.”
- I wanted to dress up like a recycling bin for Halloween, but the costume was pretty ex-pensive.
- Did you hear about the fight between the two recycling bins? It was an all-out trash talking match.
- My friend got fired from the recycling plant for throwing things out. His boss said he just wasn’t waste material.
Recycling One-Liners (15)
- Recycling one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.
- I make it a point to recycle all my ex-boyfriends.
- Don’t throw out your relationship – try recycling it first!
- My recycling efforts go in the bin more than the bin itself.
- Think twice before throwing something away – your trash could be someone else’s come up.
- Old plastic bottles don’t die, they just get recycled into something new.
- Recycling – turning today’s junk into tomorrow’s dump.
- I’m so good at recycling, I’m going green and seeing red at the same time.
- Don’t throw your money away – invest it in recycling companies!
- Recycle today or you’ll be sorry tomorrow when the landfills take over.
- One man’s recycling is another man’s cleaning up the planet.
- Recycling: Helping the earth one empty beer can at a time.
- I love recycling – it’s the best way to be eco-nomical.
- Recycling: Turning bottles into bottles since 1970.
- Recycle it, don’t waste it – that’s my green motto.
Best Recycling Jokes (20)
1. I finally convinced my roommate to start recycling her pizza boxes instead of just throwing them out. She admitted I had some valid points, but told me to quit pressing the cardboard issue.
2. My friend got hired to lead the local high school’s new recycling club. She’s not too keen on the idea, so I told her to just give the job her best recyclable effort.
3. My girlfriend broke up with me because I never recycle. She said I’m not committed to the environment, and she needs someone who is more green-minded. Personally, I think she’s making a mountain out of a landfill.
4. I was feeling nostalgic, so I called up my high school ex-girlfriend to chat. She didn’t seem thrilled to hear from me. I guess she doesn’t believe in recycling old flames.
5. I came up with a great business idea – a recycling plant that’s also a gym. The slogan would be “Reduce, Reuse, and Workout!” Now I just need to get investors as excited as I am about combining paper with spin class.
6. My lazy roommate just throws all her bottles in the regular trash. I keep yelling at her that they belong in the recycling bin, not the wastebasket. But she refuses to get the deposit back on her deposits.
7. I got fed up with my roommate never rinsing out her recyclables before tossing them in the bin. So I reused some dirty dish water and gave them a rinse myself right before the truck came. She didn’t appreciate my “spot cleaning” but I got my point across.
8. I was feeling down about being single again, so I called up my old high school boyfriend to go on a nostalgia date. He said he was flattered but preferred not to recycle relationships. He always was more committed to helping the environment than dating me.
9. My girlfriend decided to repurpose our entire apartment with recycled materials as an Earth Day gift to me. I appreciate her environmentally friendly intentions, but living room furniture made entirely of old tires is a little much.
10. I decided to surprise my girlfriend for Valentine’s Day by proposing with a ring made from recycled cans. Unfortunately, the pull tab ring did not have quite the dazzling effect I was hoping for.
11. I was so fed up with my roommate never taking out the recycling, I hid it all under her bed so she’d have to deal with it. Turns out endless boxes of old wine bottles don’t make for great interior design.
12. My girlfriend insists on only buying recycled toilet paper to be environmentally friendly. I’m all for saving the planet, but 40 grit sandpaper is really hard on certain sensitive areas, if you know what I mean.
13. I was feeling down about being single, so I called up my college ex and asked if she wanted to give it another try for old time’s sake. She said she already tried recycling me once and it didn’t work out too great, so I should probably just be taken to a hazardous waste center at this point.
14. My roommate bought us some hippie deodorant made from recycled materials and essential oils. Now my armpits smell like a mix between patchouli incense and the city dump.
15. I decided to get into the recycling business by collecting all the empty beer cans in the neighborhood for redemption money. I ended up getting arrested for rummaging through recycling bins and had to call my girlfriend for bail. Not my most well thought out get rich quick scheme.
16. My girlfriend loves repurposing old clothes into fun crafts. Last Christmas, she gave me a scarf made from recycled underwear. Nothing says holiday spirit like getting intimates from your loved one.
17. I tried to do something nice and clean up my neighbor’s overflowing recycling bin for them. They caught me and called the cops about me “stealing” recyclables. Some people just don’t understand the concept of reduce, reuse, recycle.
18. I entered my dog in a pet fashion show featuring eco-friendly costumes made from recycled materials. He came in first place dressed as a dragon made from old soda cans, but he kept trying to chew off all the tabs.
19. I decided to save money by wrapping my girlfriend’s birthday present in old newspaper instead of gift wrap. She was not nearly as charmed by my frugal recycling efforts as I hoped and told me to try again next year.
20. My roommate is obsessed with finding ways to recycle everything. The final straw was when she tried to compost her toenail clippings on our kitchen counter. Some things just aren’t meant to be reused.