Tan Puns
- I used to be pale, but after getting a tan I’m a shade tanner!
- My friend was so pale that I told him he needs to get out more and work on his tan lines.
- The tanning salon had a special for people who visit frequently – they called it the tan-gent plan.
- I entered a contest for best tan at the beach, but I ended up winning by default – I was the lesser of two tanners.
- My sister loves laying out in the sun so much that her nickname is Tan-ya.
- The movie star was known for her dark tan. She was a real Tan-talizer.
- I spent so much time in the tanning bed my skin tone is practically Tan-gible now!
- The sunbather was so tanned that her skin was practically sunburn-proof. You could say she worked on developing a perma-tan.
- When I got home from vacation, my jealous friends said I was tanning like it’s my job. What can I say, I’m a natural tan-ent!
- My friend entered a spray tan contest. I told her if she wins, it will be a tan-triumph!
Tan One-Liners
- I’m so pale I reflect sunlight – I definitely need a tan!
- People say I look washed out. A tan would help me look lively and bright.
- Without a tan I blend right into the wall – time to get some color!
- Tan skin just looks healthy – pale skin, not so much.
- If I don’t tan soon, I’ll be voted “most likely to play a vampire.”
- Pale skin is so last season – time to get bronzed!
- Tanning helps hide my pale complexion. I tan, therefore I am!
- Why be a wallflower when you can be a tan, gorgeous sunflower?
- Tans make everyone look instantly younger and vibranter.
- Tanning beds: for when you need a glow, rain or shine!
Best Tan Jokes
11. I asked my pale friend if she wanted to come tanning with me. She said, “No thanks, I don’t want to look Tan-orexic.”
12. My friend entered a tanning contest but lost to a girl who was nearly orange. I guess you could say she got out-tan.
13. I’m so pale that when I went to the beach, people mistook me for a seagull. I really need a tan!
14. I told my coworker she looked sickly from lack of sun. She said, “I don’t tan, I burn.” I told her, “A sunburn still counts as a tan in my book!”
15. Growing up, my sister used to sneak out to go tanning. My parents would ground her, but her tan was worth the Tan-trums she threw.
16. My friend loves tanning so much, she applied to work part time at a tanning salon just to get free sessions. She would make a great Tan-ployee.
17. I went tanning yesterday and got burned to a crisp. My girlfriend scolded me saying, “Haven’t you ever heard the phrase Tan in moderation?”
18. In the summer, my sister lays out wearing tin foil to intensify her tan. We call her Tan-3PO behind her back.
19. Growing up, we couldn’t afford tanning salon memberships. We would just Tan in the backyard until mom yelled, “You kids are going to Tan your hides!”
20. My friend only tans her right arm. When I asked why, she said, “I’m going for the Tanos look!”
21. I entered my Chihuahua in a doggy tan contest. I told him if he wins, he’ll be a Tan-champion.
22. My sister loves obsessively tanning. We tell her she’s going to turn into Tan leather when she gets older.
23. Growing up, we used baby oil instead of tanning oil. Our mom would yell, “You kids are going to be Tan when you’re 30!”
24. I told my pale Goth friend he needed a tan badly. He said, “The only color I need is black.”
25. How do you know when you have a Tan addiction? You go to tanning salons named “Tan-ning Beds and More” and “LA Tan.”
26. The tanning salon had a back to school special: Tan 10 times before summer ends and get 2 free sessions.
27. I’m so pale, I put on sunscreen just to check the mail. A tan would literally save my skin.
28. Don’t let tanning distract you from school kids! Unless you want to be a bronze dropout.
29. Why did the tan cross the road? To get to the tanning salon before happy hour ended.
30. They say tanning ages you, but so does being pale and sickly looking! I’ll take some color.
31. Don’t Tan and drive kids. Wait until you get to the beach to start tanning responsibly.
32. Be careful not to Tan and text either. You don’t want to end up burnt to a crisp!
33. Why was the tanner asked to leave the restaurant? They had a no shoes, no shirt, no Tan policy.
34. Don’t listen to Tan shaming people. Just Tan responsibly with good sunscreen and moderation.
35. What do you call someone addicted to tanning? A Tan-atic!
36. My friend loves tanning so much, she bought a cardboard cutout to Tan with her. She literally Tandem tans!
37. Be careful tanning on a cruise. You don’t want to end up over-bored!
38. What’s the best thing about a spray tan? No Tan lines!
39. Don’t Tan poolside with goggles kids – you’ll end up with reverse Tan lines!
40. Why do ghosts love to tan? It helps give them more color!
41. Why was the tanned man walking sideways on the beach? To get an even Tan!
42. Don’t forget to tan evenly on both sides kids, you don’t want to end up lop-Tan-ed.
43. Why did the two tanorexics break up? They just weren’t Tandem anymore.
44. How do you help someone recover from a tan addiction? You stage a Tan-tervention!
45. Be careful not to doze off while tanning, unless you want to end up with Tan-talizing sunburns.
46. Why do pale people make the best vampires? They don’t need any extra Tan makeup!
47. Don’t forget sunscreen while tanning kids. We want responsible coloring, not sunburn!
48. How do you know your tan is fading? When people start mistaking you for a vampire again!
49. Why was the tanned man asked to leave the casino? His dark color gave him an unfair Tan advantage.
50. Don’t forget to drink lots of water while tanning kids. Good hydration prevents over-tanning!
51. Why do birds fly south for winter? For some fun in the sun tanning of course!
52. Why did the tanorexic’s boyfriend break up with her? She was too into tanning beds and more.
53. How can you tell when someone has gone tanning? Their skin gets that glamorous sun-kissed glow!
54. Make sure to Tan evenly folks. You don’t want to end up looking two-faced!
55. How do you know when you’ve tanned too much? When people start calling you Tan-zilla!
56. Why was the pale girl jealous of her tanned friend? She was green with Tan-vy!
57. Don’t try to Tan too fast kids. Getting color takes time and patience!
58. Why did the orange man get kicked out of the tanning salon? For excessive Tan-ning!
59. Don’t forget to reapply sunscreen often while tanning folks. No one wants to end up burnt to a Tan crisp!
60. How do you know someone is addicted to tanning? They say they are just getting “a little more Tan” but come out burnt orange!