Spring Puns (15)
1. What do you call a row of rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare-line.
2. Why was the daffodil so popular? It just sprang up out of the grass!
3. What did the honeybee say to the flowers? Glad I can finally pollen-ate with you!
4. What’s the worst thing about spring allergies? Achoo never know when they’ll strike next!
5. Why do robber bees steal from flowers? They just want to pollen-ate your garden!
6. Did you hear about the bumblebee who went on vacation? He booked a buzzzzz flight to the tropics!
7. What do you call a singing spring? A carol-ing season!
8. How does a cactus feel in the springtime? Prickly with anticipation!
9. Why was the tulip angry at the sun? It was giving him too much shade.
10. Why do trees get pollen allergies? They’re just being oak-ward around flowers!
11. What do you call a lazy spring? A nap-ril season!
12. Why did the flower blush? It saw the bee’s stamen!
13. How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.
14. What do you call a field of hibernating flowers? A sleeping beauties patch!
15. What do you call spring in England? A rainy season.
Spring One-Liners (15)
16. Spring has sprung, but my allergies sure have flung.
17. April showers bring May flowers. And pollen. Lots of pollen.
18. Spring: when mother nature plays an April fools joke and makes you think summer’s here early.
19. Spring cleaning? More like spring sneezing with all this pollen!
20. Roses are red, the grass is green, my nose is stuffed, and my eyes stream.
21. Hay fever? More like see-you-later fever am I right?
22. Spring allergies got me singing the blues. The achoo blues.
23. Blew my nose so hard it sprang a leak!
24. Spring forward, fall back, blow nose, repeat.
25. My grass allergy has turned yard work into achoo work.
26. Spring is here, my nose is clear! Said no one with allergies ever.
27. Achoo! Gesundheit! Hey, stop sneezing on the produce!
28. Hooked on pollen-ics! Achoo!
29. Tis the sneezing season.
30. Spring ahead, achoo like crazy.
Best Spring Jokes (25)
31. It was the first warm day of spring and two bees were buzzing around looking for flowers to pollinate. “Hey! Check out that field of tulips over there!” said the first bee. The second bee replied, “Nah, too many petals on those, let’s try the roses instead.” The first bee frowned and said, “Come on, we’re supposed to bee pollinating plants today!”
32. One spring day, a bee was busy working in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the flowers were blooming. The bee buzzed over to a sunflower and said “Boy, pollinating all these flowers sure has me buzzing with excitement!” The sunflower said “I know, bee! Spring is pollen-tastic!” They both started giggling at the silly flower puns.
33. Why did the lazy daisy get fired? For not pulling his weight!
34. How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.
35. What happens when frogs park illegally? They get toad away.
36. What do you call a hippie’s wife? Mississippi!
37. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
38. Why don’t Eggs tell jokes? Because they’d crack each other up.
39. I don’t trust those trees. They seem kinda shady.
40. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant.
41. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
42. What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.
43. Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
44. Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.
45. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
46. What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!
47. How many apples grow on trees? All of them!
48. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!
49. Did you hear about the hungry clock? It went back four seconds.
50. I couldn’t figure out how the seatbelt worked. Then it just clicked.
51. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere!
52. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time!
53. I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day!
54. Why can’t a bicycle stand up by itself? Because it’s two tired!
55. I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.
