Sink Puns (17)
1. My new stainless steel sink arrived, but when I opened the box it was missing. Now that’s an ab-sink-t mistake!
2. I was trying to install my new porcelain sink but I chipped the basin. Let’s just say I’m in hot water now.
3. Did you hear about the sink that was arrested? It was charged with a countersinking offense!
4. Why don’t sinks go on vacation? Because they have too much drainage to deal with.
5. The plumber was running late to his appointment so I told him there was no rust-in.
6. Our new motion-activated sink turns on whenever you wave at it. You could say it responds well to any sink-ular motion.
7. I entered my sink in a comedy competition but unfortunately none of its jokes landed.
8. Did you know that sinks can be quite territorial? That’s because they guard their drain-main.
9. Our bathroom sink is clogged again. I guess you could say it’s in a state of dis-sink-tery.
10. Be careful using liquid drain cleaner – that stuff will corrosion control.
11. The plumber charged us way too much to fix our sink. Next time I’m going with Sink Better Plumbing.
12. I accidentally dropped a heavy pot in the sink and now there’s water spewing everywhere. You could say I’m in hot water.
13. Our sink backed up something awful. You could say it was a draining experience.
14. I bought my kid a toy sink with running water for her birthday. She loves playing in her sinktation.
15. I decided to install an infinity drainage system for my sink. Now the water spins around until it loses momentum.
16. Our bathroom sink sprung a leak. I guess you could say it was the last straw that soak the camel’s back.
17. Did you hear about the sink salesman who was arrested for fraud? Apparently all of his deals went down the drain.
Sink One-Liners (14)
18. My new sink is so shallow I can hardly wash my fins in it.
19. I bought my sink second-hand and had to replace all the plumbing – it was quite the pipe dream.
20. This morning there was a pile of dishes in my sink so high it was above sea level.
21. My sink backed up with dirty dishwater – talk about being up sink’s creek without a paddle.
22. I slipped and fell onto the faucet – boy, did I make a big splash!
23. Be careful leaning over the sink, or you might take an unexpected bath.
24. Our kitchen sink smells worse than low tide on a hot day.
25. I accidentally dropped my keys down the sink drain – time to call the plumber again.
26. My preschooler dumped an entire bucket of legos into the bathroom sink – talk about going down the drain!
27. I wanted an outdoor sink for my patio but couldn’t justify the expense – those things drain your wallet fast!
28. My guests kept rinsing food down my sink so I installed a garbage disposal – now that’s what I call sink or swim.
29. Our upstairs sink sprung a major leak and flooded the kitchen ceiling – now that’s what I call a wash out!
30. I chipped my favorite coffee mug in the sink this morning – talk about a crack down the middle!
31. Sink problems seem to follow me no matter where I live – I think I have drainage issues.
Best Sink Jokes (31)
32. Last night I dreamed I was a bathroom sink. When I woke up I felt drained.
33. What do you call a superhero with sink powers? The Plunger!
34. Why don’t oysters give to charity? Because they’re shellfish!
35. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere!
36. I entered my overweight Labrador in a sink race. Don’t worry, he’s a wide retriever.
37. What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!
38. Did you know sinks have an arch-nemesis? Yup, it’s the dishwasher!
39. Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
40. Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind, it’s tearable.
41. My wife asked me to take all the clothes out of the hamper and put them in the sink to soak. That was quite the laundry list.
42. Why do chefs make terrible hotel owners? Because they always over-baste the rooms!
43. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota!
44. Did you know that plastic surgery was pioneered for kitchen sinks? Yup, it was for countertop reconstructions.
45. Why do you rarely see elephants hiding in sinks? Because they’re really bad at it!
46. What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree!
47. Did you hear about the restaurant on Mars? Great food, no atmosphere!
48. Someone broke into my house last night and flooded my sinks. The cops said they’d keep an eye out for the sink-lar!
49. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they’d crack each other up!
50. Did you know you can tune a sink? Yup, with a fork and knife!
51. Why are there gates around cemeteries? Because people are dying to get in!
52. Someone broke into my house and stole my entire sink collection. Now the cops are looking for the kitchen sink!
53. Did you hear about the restaurant on Mars? Amazing food, no atmosphere.
54. What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk!
55. Where do you take a sick boat? To the dock!
56. Someone called in a noise complaint about my malfunctioning garbage disposal. I told the cops it was just noisy neighbors.
57. I was cleaning the sink when I slipped on a wet sponge. Broke my arm in the basin area.
58. Why was the kitchen sink arrested? For outstanding drains!
59. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
60. How does Moses make his coffee? Hebrews it!
61. Someone broke into my garage and stole my whole sink collection. Now the cops are looking for the kitchen sink!
62. I bought my friend a new kitchen sink for her birthday. She was really surprised…it came right out of the basin!
