Polar Bear Puns
- What do you call a polar bear wearing earmuffs? Anything you want, he can’t hear you.
- What do you get when you cross a polar bear with a seal? A polar seal of approval.
- Why don’t polar bears like fast food? They can’t catch it.
- My friend saw a polar bear picking its nose. I said “Stop polar bearin’ false witness.”
- What do you call a polar bear in the tropics? Lost.
- What do you call a polar bear in a blizzard? Camouflaged.
- How do polar bears stay connected? With bear Wifi.
- Why don’t polar bears eat penguins? Because they can’t find the ice box.
- What do you call a polar bear floating on an iceberg? An ice bear.
- What do you call a sleeping polar bear? A polar nightmare.
Polar Bear One-Liners
- Polar bears are actually left handed.
- I was gonna tell a joke about polar bears, but it would just break the ice.
- What did the polar bear wear on his head? An ice cap!
- Polar bears don’t go to the hospital. They prefer to ice-olate.
- How does a polar bear build its house? Igloos it together.
- What did the mother polar bear say to her cub before hunting? “Ice you later!”
- What do you call a polar bear on thin ice? Breaking news.
- My friend saw a polar bear wearing a sombrero. I said “You gotta be kidding me.”
- How do polar bears keep fish cold? They put them on ice.
- Polar bears aren’t actually bears. They’re marsupials disguised as bears.
Best Polar Bear Jokes
21. A polar bear walks into a bar and says, “I’ll have a………………beer.” The bartender asks, “Why the big pause?” The bear looks down and says, “I don’t know, I was born this way.”
22. What did the mama polar bear say when her baby was being noisy? “Can you keep it down? I’m trying to catch some snow zs.”
23. Why don’t polar bears ever get married? They get cold feet!
24. How do you stop a polar bear attack? Freeze and hope it passes by you.
25. What did the polar bear have for lunch? An artic-choke salad with iceberg lettuce.
26. What do you call a polar bear in the jungle? Lost and confused.
27. Why do polar bears smell? So blind penguins can detect them.
28. Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.
29. Why did the polar bear cross the road? To break the ice.
30. How do you stop a charging polar bear? Take away its credit card.
31. What do you call a polar bear wearing earmuffs and a winter hat? Anything you want, he can’t hear or see you.
32. What happens when a polar bear walks into a bar? It looks around and says “So this is the bear minimum huh?”
33. Which day of the week do polar bears dread? Fry-day when the ice melts.
34. Why are polar bears ghosts always hungry? Because the food goes right through them.
35. How do you know if a polar bear has been in your fridge? Paw prints in the butter.
36. Where do polar bears keep their money? In a snowbank.
37. Why do polar bears have fur coats? Because they’d look silly in jackets.
38. How do polar bears stay warm? They wear layers… and layers… and layers.
39. What’s a polar bear’s favorite cereal? Ice Krispies.
40. Why don’t polar bears eat clowns? Because they taste funny.
41. How do you stop a polar bear from charging? You take away its credit card.
42. What do you give a seasick polar bear? Anything you want, he can’t keep it down.
43. Why are polar bear paws so big? For face palming at bad polar bear jokes.
44. What do you call a polar bear in the summer? A puddle bear.
45. Why did the polar bear cross the equator? To get to the other tide.
46. What did the polar bear say when it sat on ice? “Brrr… this is cold on my bear behind!”
47. Why don’t polar bears eat cactuses? They’re afraid of pricks.