Pelican Puns (10)
1. What do you call a pelican that sits on your head? A headache!
2. Why don’t pelicans like rainy weather? Because it makes them wettericans.
3. Why don’t pelicans need umbrellas when it rains? Because they already have built-in raincoats.
4. What do you call a pelican that flies upside down? A sillycan.
5. Why don’t pelicans get hungry? Because they can eat whenever they want!
6. How do pelicans communicate long distance? They use pelicall phones.
7. Why did the pelican get arrested? It was caught tres-beaking.
8. What do you call a pelican that meditates? A zen-ican.
9. How do pelicans stay connected? With pelicables.
10. Why don’t pelicans tell secrets? Because they can’t keep anything under their bill.
Pelican One-Liners (12)
11. I tried catching some pelicans but it turns out they’re pretty hard to get a bill on.
12. Pelicans may have large bills but luckily they don’t charge much.
13. Pelicans like to stick together until the bill comes.
14. Pelicans always fly in perfect formation, it allows them to conserve billergy.
15. Pelicans can hold more in their bill than meets the eye.
16. Pelicans have strange courtship rituals, the male will present the female with the bill.
17. Pelicans can eat up to 25 percent of their body weight in fish…that’s a lot of billy calories!
18. Pelicans are graceful in flight but look downright silly walking around on land.
19. Pelicans may be water birds but they never seem to get a bill from the utility company.
20. A group of pelicans in flight is called a squadron, makes sense with how they fly in perfect formation.
21. Pelicans can have wingspans over 9 feet wide, talk about living large!
22. Pelicans have specially designed bills that drain out excess salt water, pretty billiant if you ask me.
Best Pelican Jokes (8)
23. What did the pelican say when his bill was stolen? “Someone’s gotta pay this bill!”
24. A pelican walks into a bait shop and picks up a bucket of fish. He tries to walk out without paying. “Hey!” says the owner. “Aren’t you going to pay for that?” The pelican shakes his head. “But pelicans can’t talk!” says the owner. The pelican nods, then flies away. The next day the pelican returns to the bait shop and steals another bucket of fish. Again the owner yells at him to pay. Again, the pelican shakes his head no. “But pelicans can’t talk!” exclaims the owner. Once more the pelican nods, then flies away. On the third day, the pelican comes back to the bait shop to steal more fish. The owner, fed up, grabs the pelican by the bill and pins him against the wall. “Look, I know you can’t talk,” says the owner. “But you have to pay for the fish!” The pelican sighs, then mumbles softly “But pelicans can’t talk…”
25. What do you get if you cross a centipede with a pelican? A beast with a hundred feet and a ten foot bill!
26. How can you tell a pelican is hungry? When it sticks its bill in your face and says “Hey buddy, wanna buy me some dinner?”
27. Why don’t pelicans need to wear life jackets? Because they already have flotation devices built right into their face!
28. What’s the difference between a pelican and a postman? One delivers the mail and the other delivers the bill!
29. How do pelicans drink water? They don’t, they just get their bills wet.
30. Why don’t pelicans like eating clownfish? Because they taste funny.
31. What’s the most tech-savvy ocean bird? The pel-iCan!
32. Why are pelicans considered aquatic birds even though they spend a lot of time on land? Because their bills are always over-dew.