Peacock Puns
1. What do you call a peacock that can’t find his keys? A peaCOCK!
2. Why do peacocks make bad spies? Because they have huge tail feathers!
3. How does a peacock greet his friends? With a “Hi, I’m Pea-cock!”
4. What do you call a peacock who works as a barber? A peaCOCK!
5. Why don’t peacocks feel guilty when they eat too much? Because they can always justify it!
6. What do you call a peacock that leads an army? General PeaCOCK!
7. Why don’t peacocks need alarm clocks? Their built-in tail feathers wake them up!
8. Why are peacocks terrible at keeping secrets? Because they are loud mouths!
9. What do you call a peacock who loves to read books? A bookworm peaCOCK!
10. Why do peacocks make great tree climbers? They have natural climbing spikes on their feet!
Peacock One-Liners
11. I saw a peacock preening his feathers today; he was quite vain about his good looks!
12. That peacock is so loud, he could wake the dead with his calls!
13. Don’t invite that peacock to a fancy dinner – he’ll steal the show with his flashy tail!
14. I’d stay away from that cranky peacock if I were you – he’s liable to fan out his tail feathers and charge!
15. Peacocks don’t fly much – probably because it’s too hard to take off with that giant tail!
16. If peacocks could twerk, their tail feathers would make them champion twerkers!
17. Don’t be fooled by his charm – that peacock is a savage killer when it comes to defending his territory.
18. The male peacock fanned his flashy tail feathers to impress the female, but she just ignored him and walked away.
19. That peacock is strutting around like he owns the place – typical arrogant bird behavior.
20. When a peacock spreads its tail feathers, watch out – it’s about to attack!
Best Peacock Jokes
21. A peacock was arrested at the zoo today for indecent exposure. Apparently he was flashing his feathers at visitors! The zookeeper had to throw a sheet over him and take him into custody. The peacock pleaded innocence, claiming he was just born colorful. But they booked him anyway for disturbing the public peace. His lawyer argued no crime was committed since peacocks don’t wear clothes! It will be an interesting trial for sure.
22. A man went to India and saw a peacock for the first time. He was amazed by the peacock’s huge, colorful tail feathers dragging behind it. He asked his guide, “Why is that bird dragging around such a heavy burden?” The guide replied, “That’s no burden, that’s the peacock’s pride and joy.” The man realized we all have our own burdens in life, but what some see as a burden, others take pride in.
23. Joe was visiting his friend’s farm when he saw a peacock. He had never seen one before and asked his friend, “Why is that chicken so ugly?” His friend laughed and said, “That’s not a chicken, that’s a peacock.” Joe was embarrassed but admitted he knew very little about farm animals. His friend explained how peacocks were prized for their beautiful, shimmering tail feathers. Joe learned an important lesson – not to judge based on appearances, because what may seem ugly at first glance can really be beautiful if you learn more.
24. Jake was visiting the zoo with his family and excitedly ran up to the peacock exhibit yelling, “Mommy look at the big turkey!” An amused peacock turned and fanned his tail feathers out in full display. Jake was amazed and said, “Wooow, that’s the biggest turkey tail I’ve ever seen!” Jake’s mom had to explain that it was actually a male peacock. Jake didn’t care, he just thought it was the coolest turkey ever. The beautiful peacock continued strutting around, unaware of the mistaken identity but proud to show off his tail feathers.
25. Amy was visiting a friend’s farm when she spotted something colorful out of the corner of her eye. She turned to see an incredible bird with shimmering tail feathers that took her breath away. “What is that gorgeous bird?” she asked her friend. “That’s just our peacock Bertie,” he replied. Amy was stunned Bertie was a peacock. She had no idea they were so beautiful. For the rest of the day Amy followed Bertie around, marveling at his iridescent tail feathers. She tried photographing him but the pictures didn’t do him justice. From then on Amy had a newfound appreciation for peacocks.
26. Samantha decided to get a peacock for her mini farm despite her husband’s objections. “They’re loud, obnoxious and destroy gardens!” he complained. Nonetheless, Samantha brought home a peachick she named Peabody. At first Peabody was quite homely, but as his tail feathers grew in he became stunningly beautiful. When he fanned his shimmering tail, even Samantha’s husband was impressed. Peabody turned out to be gentle with a soothing call. He peacefully roamed their property and ate pests not plants. In time, Samantha’s husband came to enjoy Peabody’s company too, admitting she was right to get him. Peabody’s vibrant presence added life and beauty to their farm.
27. Martha was visiting a botanical garden when she spotted a brilliant blue peacock perched regally atop a fountain. As Martha approached, the peacock dramatically fanned its tail feathers in a stunning display. Martha was awestruck by the peacock’s radiant plumage and watched him strut about with an air of entitlement. She noticed nearby visitors were equally enthralled, capturing photos and videos of the dazzling bird. Young children pointed excitedly at the peacock’s ornate feathers. “He’s like a king holding court over his subjects!” Martha thought, amused by the spellbinding effect this charismatic bird had over the garden’s guests. The peacock flaunted his feathers for a while longer before retreating back to the foliage, leaving behind a crowd of adoring new fans.