75 Funny Olive Oil Jokes

Olive Oil Puns (15)

1. I used to work at an olive oil factory, but I got canned. Apparently I lacked the necessary skills to get a-head.
2. My friend got fired from the olive oil factory. It was sheer bad luck, he slipped up.
3. Working at an olive oil factory seems like a slipper-y slope.
4. I entered my special artisanal olive oil in a contest. Sadly, it didn’t win first prize. You could say it just wasn’t extra virgin enough.
5. I was struggling to open a bottle of olive oil so I asked my Italian friend for help. He said, “That’s amore stuck cap!”
6. Our olive oil factory just hired a new extractor that can get 10% more oil from the olives. It really helps squeeze out those extra profits!
7. When the olive oil factory upgraded to a fully automated production line, there was concern about jobs. But everything ran smoothly and no one raised a stink.
8. My new boyfriend claims he owns an olive oil company. I think it’s a bunch of bologna.
9. Working with olive oil all day leaves your hands super soft and moisturized. You could say it’s a slippery slope.
10. I accidentally used way too much olive oil when cooking dinner last night. You could say I really olive-rdid it.
11. I only use the finest quality extra virgin olive oil. Anything less just isn’t good en-olive for me.
12. Olives have to go through so much just to become olive oil. You could say they really get put through the wringer.
13. The olive oil factory was shut down for a week to upgrade the machinery. You could say it was going through a pressing time.
14. My favorite olive oil brand is “Extra Slippery.” It really helps me get out of a jam in the kitchen.
15. Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Olive.
    Olive who?
    Olive you and olive oil!

Olive Oil One-Liners (15)

1. I only use olive oil harvested by hand from 100 year old Italian olive trees planted at sunset on a full moon.
2. Olive oil is great for sautéing veggies, drizzling on salads, and slipping out of sticky situations.
3. Olive oil not only tastes delicious, it also makes a great moisturizer, lubricant, and laxative!
4. Olive oil is proof that olives can overcome adversity to fulfill their highest potential.
5. Olive oil: Made from olives, loved by all.
6. Olive oil – nature’s butter.
7. Olive oil: like drinking liquid gold.
8. Olive oil: turn your salad from sad to rad!
9. Olive oil – don’t cook without it!
10. Olive oil: It’s oily, it’s tasty, and it’s all the rave.
11. Olive oil – making healthy food delicious since ancient times.
12. Olive oil: classy, sassy, and delicious.
13. Olive oil: green on the outside, golden on the inside.
14. Olive oil: fueling Mediterranean diets (and gossip) since 3500 BC.
15. Olive oil: proof you don’t have to be Italian to love it!

Best Olive Oil Jokes (45)

1. I asked the chef what his secret ingredient was. He leaned in close and whispered, “extra virgin olive oil.” I said, “Huh, mine’s bad karaoke.”

2. Why did the olive oil win first prize at the baking contest? It was the best extra virgin!

3. My friend got into the olive oil business but had to quit. It just wasn’t his cup of tea.

4. What do you call an olive that just isn’t ready to commit to becoming oil? An extra virgin.

5. How does Moses make his olive oil? He uses a press and leaves it in the desert for 40 years.

6. I’ll never forget my first job at the olive oil factory. It was a real slippery slope but I loved being able to screw around all day.

7. Why did the mob boss dip his bread in olive oil? He wanted to make the mafia an offer it couldn’t refuse.

8. I asked my olive oil rep what his favorite music genre was. He said it was heavy metal because he loved pressin’ olives.

9. Why was the olive oil accused of being insensitive? It made a tasteless joke.

10. What do you call a sacred vat of olive oil? Holy grail.

11. My mom used to punish me as a kid by spraying me with olive oil and flour and baking me for 45 minutes at 350 degrees. Those were some tough times.

12. I entered my homemade olive oil in the state fair but they said it wasn’t actually extra virgin. Apparently nothing about me is.

13. The olive oil factory was sued for unethical business practices. They claim it’s all lies trumped up to smear their good name.

14. I’m thinking of getting into competitive olive oil tasting. The key is developing a really discerning palate and learning to spit like a champ.

15. Why couldn’t the olive become olive oil? Because it just wasn’t extra virgin enough.

16. My grandma used to smack me with an olive branch when I misbehaved. She called it tough love.

17. I caught two jars of olive oil in a heated argument. Apparently they had some beef that just couldn’t be squashed.

18. Why do Italians use olive oil in their hair? It’s the secret to their slick style.

19. Did you hear olive oil sales have plummeted? There’s been a real squeeze on the market lately.

20. I told my wife I was leaving her for a woman I met at the olive oil factory. She said I need to get my priorities straight and focus on the more pressing issues in our marriage.

21. Why did the olive oil cross the road? To get to the bar on the other side.

22. How do you fix an ailing olive oil factory? You hire a plant medic.

23. Why couldn’t the olive tree get a date? Because he was too oily.

24. Did you hear about the olive who was banished from the oil factory? He was expelled.

25. What do you call a fake olive oil? An impasta.

26. Two olives were sitting at the bar. One olive turned to the other and said, “You’re so stoned!”

27. Why was the olive oil actor fired from the cooking show? He kept hogging the camera and didn’t know how to share the spotlight.

28. Did you hear about the olive oil that was awarded a Nobel Prize? It achieved extra virgin brilliance.

29. Why do olive trees make oil? They just can’t help but be a little greasy.

30. I used to sell bootleg olive oil on the black market. Let’s just say it wasn’t exactly extra virgin.

31. What’s the olive oil’s least favorite nut? The pistachio – it’s just too green with envy.

32. Why did the olive give up her dreams of being an actress? The market for dramatic olive roles was just too slim.

33. Don’t tell my doctor, but I use extra virgin olive oil as my massage oil. Don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it!

34. What do you call an olive that refuses to be picked? Resistant.

35. Why don’t olives need massages? Because they’re already oiled up!

36. My olive oil won third place in the county fair. You win some, you lose some, olive the rest.

37. How does Moses separate and store his olive oil? He uses a press and leaves it in urns.

38. Did you hear about the failed olive oil business? Their whole enterprise went belly up.

39. Why do olive trees hate rainstorms? It dilutes their oil reserves.

40. What do you call a wimpy olive? A chicken.

41. Why was the olive oil banned from the cooking competition? It had a shady past.

42. Did you hear about the olive oil that was arrested? Apparently it was seedy.

43. How does an olive become extra virgin olive oil? It presses its luck.

44. What do you get if you pour olive oil in your shoes? Slippery feet!

45. Why do Italians use olive oil instead of butter? To grease the mafia’s wheels!

I hope you enjoyed these 75 funny olive oil jokes! Let me know if you need any other joke listicles written.