October Puns (10)
- What do you call a witch who only flies her broomstick in October? A seasonal flyer.
- Why was the October pumpkin feeling cranky? It was having a bad gourd day.
- How did the leaf know it was October? It could feel a chill in the air.
- Why did the scarecrow win the October costume contest? He was outstanding in his field.
- What’s a ghost’s favorite month? Boo-tober!
- What do you call October in Britain? Octember.
- What did the tree say on October 1st? Leaf me alone, I’m bushed!
- Why do trees take long naps in October? Because it’s fall time!
- What falls in October but never gets hurt? The leaves!
- What do you get when you cross a turkey with an ghost? A poultry-geist for Halloween.
October One-Liners (10)
- I’m so glad it’s October, it’s about time I got out of my pumpkin spice latte phase.
- Halloween candy has been on store shelves since July, but October is the one month where I don’t feel guilty about buying it.
- October has the best weather – not too hot, not too cold, all you need is a light sweater.
- October mornings are the coziest with pumpkins on the porch and the smell of cinnamon rolls wafting from the kitchen.
- Nothing beats curling up with a spooky movie and a mug of hot cider on an October weekend.
- October makes me feel like a kid again – jumping in leaf piles and getting dressed up for Halloween.
- Is it October yet? I need an excuse to buy mini candy bars in bulk.
- October is welcomed because it means goodbye humidity and bugs.
- 31 days of costumes, candy, and all things pumpkin spice…October rocks!
- October reminds us: curl up in cozy sweaters and drink more hot beverages.
Best October Jokes (23)
21. On October 1st, a dad was helping his son put up Halloween decorations in their yard. He picked up a plastic pumpkin decoration and said, “Son, let me tell you the best dad joke about pumpkins.” His son rolled his eyes and said, “Dad, I’m sure I won’t find it very gourd.
22. In October, a skeleton walked into a bar and asked for a beer and a mop. The bartender asked, “What do you need a mop for?” The skeleton replied, “Well, let’s just say I have a spill to clean up in aisle 2 of the cemetery.”
23. One October night, a police officer saw a drunken ghost stumbling down the street. The cop pulled over and said, “Had a bit too much BOO-ze tonight, haven’t you?” The ghost just hiccuped and continued stumbling down the road.
24. On Halloween night, a zombie, a ghost, and a vampire were walking home from a party. The zombie said, “That party made me feel alive again!” The ghost replied, “It scared me half to death!” The vampire said, “It really sucked the life out of me.”
25. In October, a family carved a monster face into a big pumpkin for Halloween. The youngest child said, “He looks scary!” The dad said, “Don’t worry, he’s armless.” The mom chimed in, “Quit trying to be punny.”
26. One October afternoon, a witch stopped by her friend’s house. Her friend said, “Come on in, I just brewed a pot of witch’s brew for us!” The witch replied, “Oh goodie, is it the organic, non-GMO kind?”
27. On Halloween night, a werewolf, a mummy, and Bigfoot went trick-or-treating together. At the first house, the homeowner said, “Wow, what great costumes, here’s some candy!” Bigfoot muttered, “Costumes? Who said these were costumes?”
28. One October weekend, a farm family visited a haunted corn maze. The dad said, “Remember, don’t split up in the maze or else the headless horseman will get you!” The son replied, “Dad, the headless horseman isn’t real… is he?” Just then, they heard a horse whinny behind them.
29. In October, a scarecrow entered a pumpkin carving contest. He carved an excellent pumpkin, but ended up losing to a ghost who submitted an empty pumpkin. The judges said the ghost’s submission was far more haunting.
30. What do ghosts order at Halloween restaurants? Spooketi with marinara sauce, scream of pumpkin soup, monster mash potatoes, and fright clubs for dessert.
31. In October, a new supermarket opened up called Halloweiner’s. Their mascot was a smiling hot dog named Frank N. Stein. The store sold Halloween themed foods like boo-berry pie and mummy dogs.
32. On October 31st, a zombie shuffled up to a house and rang the doorbell. The homeowner opened the door and yelled, “What do you want? Get off my lawn!” The zombie groaned, “Trick or treeeeeat.” The homeowner replied, “Oh sorry, here’s some candy.”
33. One Halloween night, a witch flew down the street on her broomstick, being chased by a police helicopter. Over the loudspeaker, the police said, “Pull over immediately, this is the police!” The witch just cackled and flew faster.
34. In October, a werewolf was howling loudly in the middle of the night. His neighbor pounded on the wall and yelled, “Quiet down or I’m calling the paw-lice!” The werewolf howled back, “No need to call the cops, I’ll keep it dowwnnnn.”
35. On Halloween night, a group of monsters were comparing notes on how they scared kids who came trick-or-treating. The zombie said, “I popped out and yelled ‘Braaaiiinnnsss!'” The vampire said, “I pretended to bite them.” The ghost said, “Boo!” They all laughed.
36. In October, a spider was busy spinning an elaborate web to catch Halloween treats. A mosquito flew by and said, “Nice decorations! Are you having a Halloween party?” The spider said, “No, this is just my regular web.”
37. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? I Scream!
38. Why didn’t the skeleton go trick or treating? Because he had no body to go with.
39. What room does a ghost not need in its house? A living room!
40. Why didn’t the vampire bite Taylor Swift? Because she had bad blood.
41. Why didn’t the mummy do well on vacation? He was too wound up the whole time.
42. What’s a ghoul’s favorite ice cream flavor? Cookies and scream!
43. Why did the headless horseman go into business? He was looking to get ahead!