Mario Puns (10)
1. Why didn’t Mario pass his driver’s test? He kept drifting on Rainbow Road!
2. What do you call a plumber with a good sense of rhythm? A super Mario brother.
3. Why does Mario have overalls and a mustache? So you can recognize him even after a pipe repair.
4. Why was Mario hesitant to go down the green pipe? He had a sinking feeling about it.
5. What do you call Mario’s favorite soda? Sprite!
6. Why does Mario like eating mushrooms? They make him grow.
7. Why was Mario mad at Luigi? He was stealing his thunder.
8. Why does Mario wear red? So he’s always hot on Bowser’s tail.
9. Why is Mario so good at tennis? He’s a master of backhand compliments.
10. Why was Mario voted prom king? He had the best boutonniere.
Mario One-Liners (10)
11. Mario finally passed the bar exam after years of trying – he really needed that extra life.
12. Luigi enjoys telling jokes about Mario’s weight – they’re low blows for short plump bros.
13. Mario is thinking about a career change – plumbing isn’t all it’s piped up to be.
14. Mario retired from kart racing to spend more time with Peach – but his efforts seem fruitless.
15. Mario swears the princess is always in another castle – but no one believes his tall tales anymore.
16. Mario keeps collecting coins but never cashes them in – he must be a really dedicated saver.
17. Mario got frustrated trying to unclog a pipe and started cursing – peas sure can be pesky!
18. Mario is still afraid of ghosts even after all these years – some things never change.
19. Mario finally went back to plumbing school to get recertified – new pipes, who dis?
20. Mario loves racing but struggles with road rage – those banana peels really tick him off.
Best Mario Jokes (12)
21. What did Mario say when he broke up with Princess Peach? “It’s not you, it’s a-me, Mario!”
Mario and Princess Peach had been dating for years, but Mario decided it was time to end things. When Princess Peach asked why, Mario gently told her “It’s not you, it’s a-me, Mario!”
22. Why does Mario always wear a helmet when go-kart racing? He’s afraid he’ll get Mario-nesia if he bumps his head.
Mario is super careful about always wearing a helmet when racing go-karts with his friends. He knows one wrong bump on the head could give him a bad case of Mario-nesia! So he straps on his helmet to keep his memories intact.
23. Why did Mario go to college? To become a pro at Mario Kart!
Even though Mario was already skilled at Mario Kart from years of racing experience, he decided to take his talents to the next level by enrolling in the prestigious Mushroom Kingdom Racing Academy. After 4 intense years of studying kart mechanics, aerodynamics, and advanced driving techniques, Mario graduated with honors at the top of his class. Now he’s on his way to becoming a true pro Mario Kart racer!
24. Why can’t Mario tell the difference between a frog and a dog? Because they both say “ribbit” to him!
Poor Mario just can’t seem to distinguish frogs from dogs. No matter how many times Luigi patiently explains that frogs ribbit and dogs bark, Mario gets confused. A frog hops by saying “ribbit?” Mario smiles and responds “Nice ribbit, doggy!” A dog runs up barking loudly, and Mario laughs “What a noisy frog!” Try as he may, those two creatures just sound exactly the same to Mario.
25. Why does Mario constantly fight turtles and travel through pipes? That’s just his plumber’s instinct kicking in.
Even though Mario has expanded his repertoire far beyond unclogging drains, his underlying plumber instincts still shine through. When he sees a turtle, he instinctively wants to jump on it like a stubborn clog. And navigating through a maze of pipes feels like second nature, just another day on the job. I guess you can take Mario out of the plumbing world, but you can’t take the plumber out of Mario!
26. Why can’t Mario tell time? He’s stuck in the Mushroom Kingdom!
Poor Mario has no concept of time whatsoever. Minutes, hours, days – it’s all a blur in the magical Mushroom Kingdom! Perhaps it’s the way the clouds drift so slowly, or how the flags wave lazily in the breeze. Or maybe Mario just spends too much time zipping through pipes and floating up with superstars. Whatever the reason, Mario is happily oblivious, telling time only by his grumbling stomach!
27. Why did Mario start smoking? To help spot where the Princess is when she’s in another castle!
Mario was tired of searching every nook and cranny of every castle to find Princess Peach, only to be told she was in another castle again! So he devised a clever solution – he took up smoking. Now whenever Mario enters a new castle, he takes a big puff on his cigar. If he can see the telltale smoke drift up a few stories, he knows exactly where the princess is being held! Genius!
28. Why can’t ghosts haunt Mario? Because he lives in a no-boo neighborhood!
Mario doesn’t have to worry about ghosts spooking and scaring him in the middle of the night. Why not? Because he lives in a strict no-boo neighborhood! The Mario Brothers were very careful to find housing in an area with a zero boos allowed policy. That’s why Mario sleeps so soundly – no boos floating around to haunt him!
29. Why does Mario keep jumping over barrels? He’s still stuck in the Donkey Kong phase!
Even decades after his fateful encounter with Donkey Kong, Mario just can’t seem to shake some habits. Nowadays when he encounters a barrel, Mario instinctively crouches down and leaps right over it. Onlookers scratch their heads wondering why he’s jumping over an ordinary barrel, but it’s just second nature to Mario. That Donkey Kong phase really left an imprint!
30. Why can’t Mario ever keep his house clean? Too many koopa troopas tromping around!
Poor Mario tries his best to keep his little house tidy, but those pesky koopa troopas make it virtually impossible! They’re always stomping through the pipes, tracking mud on the carpets, and leaving banana peels everywhere. The minute Mario finishes sweeping, a koopa troopa squad comes marching down the stairs undoing all his hard work. If only they wiped their feet once in a while!
31. Why does Mario stick with overalls and not wear proper work uniforms? He’s not too concerned with plumbing dress codes!
As a plumber, Mario could choose to wear the standard white button down shirt and dark trousers. But he’s not too concerned about looking professional. Comfort is key for Mario, so he sticks with his signature outfit – denim overalls and a red shirt. Proper uniform or not, Mario gets the job done, and that’s all that matters to him!
32. Why is Mario so good at sports like tennis and golf? He knows how to take advantage of all that free time between princess rescues!
Mario realized all his quests to rescue Princess Peach gave him sporadic chunks of free time. So he took up recreational sports to fill those gaps productively. Now Mario is an accomplished tennis pro and golf champion. All that time hopping over koopas paid off – who knew marathon sprints and cannonball dodging were the perfect training for sports success?