Labor Day Puns
- What do you call a lazy construction worker? A slacker!
- My friend got fired from the calendar factory. All he did was take a day off!
- I heard there was a big sale on Labor Day at the grocery store. Everything was 100% off!
- Why don’t cows ever get a day off? Because they’re on the moo-ve 24/7!
- What do you call a relaxed Labor Day get-together? A laid-back barbecue!
- The factory workers decided to go on vacation. I guess you could say they were going on a labor staycation!
- I entered a Labor Day pie eating contest. It was very filling!
- Did you hear about the unsuccessful Labor Day fireworks show? It was a total fizzle!
- My friend works at the post office and always takes Labor Day off. He says he needs a stamp-cation.
- Our Labor Day picnic got rained out. What a damper on our plans!
- I’m so exhausted after Labor Day weekend. It really took a toll on me!
- The lazy construction worker was fired for sleeping on the job. I guess he was caught napping!
- My boss threw a Labor Day party but didn’t invite any of the employees. It was a real work-free celebration!
- I entered the Labor Day baking contest but my cake was pretty crummy. Oh well, back to the drawing board!
- Did you hear about the unsuccessful Labor Day mattress sale? It was a total flop!
Labor Day One-Liners
- Labor Day is the perfect day to relax and do… nothing!
- Resting on Labor Day? Sounds like a plan!
- Labor Day weekend: work hard, play hard!
- BBQ, beer, and a day off? Yes please!
- A day off work never hurt anyone.
- Labor Day gives “relaxation” a whole new meaning.
- Time to fire up the grill and chill!
- Let’s get this Labor Day party started!
- Labor Day: the most relaxing day of the year.
- Sleeping in? On Labor Day? Absolutely.
- Labor Day is just what I need after a long week.
- A day dedicated to NOT working? Sign me up!
- Labor Day weekend plans: lounge chair, lemonade, and lazy days.
- Labor Day = a day OFF from labor.
- Can’t wait to do a whole lotta nothing on Labor Day!
Best Labor Day Jokes
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My boss called an emergency meeting right before Labor Day weekend. He said, “I know this is short notice, but I need all of you to come in to work on Labor Day.” The entire staff groaned.
My coworker Chris piped up, “But sir, Labor Day is a national holiday celebrating the achievements of workers! Making us come in defeats the whole purpose.”
Our boss sighed and said, “Okay fine, you all have convinced me. Take Labor Day off and enjoy your long weekend.”
We all cheered – crisis averted! As we were gathering our things to leave, Chris laughed and said, “Hey, it was Labor Day getting us that 3-day weekend!”
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My neighbors were hosting their annual Labor Day barbecue, so I decided to stop by. As I entered the backyard, I saw the dad struggling to light the grill.
“Need some help?” I asked.
“Nope, I’ve got it,” he insisted, even though the coals clearly needed more time.
A few minutes later, smoke was pouring out from the grill and the burgers were charred black. His wife just shook her head and said, “Honey, next year for Labor Day maybe you should just relax and let someone else handle the grilling!”
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Jill was dreading going back to work after Labor Day weekend. On Tuesday morning, she dragged herself out of bed and slowly started getting ready.
She was about to walk out the door when she had an idea. Jill laid down on the floor, pretended to strain herself, and yelled, “Owww my back!” Then she immediately called her office and left a voicemail:
“Hi, it’s Jill. I threw my back out while doing some heavy lifting over Labor Day and can’t make it in today.”
She smiled and crawled right back into bed – after all, she deserved one more day of rest!
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My cousin invited me to go camping over Labor Day weekend. I just laughed and said, “Thanks, but no thanks. The only kind of camping I do on Labor Day involves pitching a tent in my backyard, roasting marshmallows, and not lifting a finger all day long!”
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I recently started dating a girl who owns her own landscaping company. When she told me she still has to work on Labor Day, I said, “That’s too bad – I was hoping we could spend the day relaxing together.”
She just smiled and replied, “Oh no, I believe in celebrating Labor Day! I’m closing the company and giving all my employees paid time off. Then you and I are going on a trip!” Gotta love a woman who recognizes the importance of giving back to her laborers!
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My parents recently retired and were telling me about their big plans for Labor Day weekend. “We’re going to finally organize the garage and do some deep cleaning around the house!” my mom said excitedly.
My dad chimed in, “And re-stain the back deck that’s been needing it for months!”
I just shook my head and said, “Mom, Dad, the point of Labor Day is to take a break from labor! Watch a movie, go on a picnic, take a nap – just relax for once!” They just laughed and said, “Retirement is no time for relaxing!”
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I was so ready for a break that I took the Friday before Labor Day off work to give myself a long weekend. My boss called me that morning and said, “Hey Ryan, sorry to bother you on your day off but we really need you to come in today.”
I responded, “Sorry, can’t. I’m up at my cabin with no cell service about to go off the grid until Tuesday.” Then I happily turned off my phone, put on some tunes, and enjoyed kicking off my staycation!
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On Labor Day my neighbor John was out mowing his lawn bright and early. I walked over and said jokingly, “Working hard today, huh John?”
He replied defensively, “Just trying to get my chores done so I can relax!”
I told him, “It’s Labor Day, let the grass grow and take it easy like the rest of us!”
I think my words finally sunk in. He turned off the mower and said with a chuckle, “You know what, you’re right. This bud’s for you!” and handed me a beer. Happy Labor Day indeed!
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When I was a kid, Labor Day at my house meant one thing: a big family barbecue in the backyard. One year when I was about seven, all my relatives were over and the adults were busy talking and playing lawn games.
I kept hearing my stomach grumble, so I finally yelled out, “When are we eating?!?” My uncle laughed and said, “Sounds like someone is ready for a burger!” Then he put me in charge of cooking all the hot dogs and hamburgers for the party. Hey, child labor laws don’t apply on Labor Day!
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Last Labor Day my neighbors Phil and Susan invited me over to their backyard pool to celebrate the holiday. When I arrived, I found Phil vacuuming the bottom of the pool and Susan skimming the surface with a net.
I called out, “Guys, why are you cleaning the pool on Labor Day? Take a break and let’s fire up the barbecue!”
They looked at each other guiltily and said, “You’re right! This can wait.” Then Phil grabbed some beers from the cooler and said, “The only labor we should be doing today is grilling up some burgers!”
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My wife Jenny and I were discussing our Labor Day plans. I said, “Maybe we should go camping and really rough it – set up a tent, go fishing, hike some trails.”
Jenny said, “Or we could set up a tent in the backyard for the kids, buy some fish fillets at the store, and walk around the block. That’s about as laborious as I want to get on my day off!”
I laughed and said, “Good point. Let’s just relax and enjoy having nowhere to be.” Because isn’t that what Labor Day is really all about!
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My boss always schedules a big product launch in early September. When he put one on the calendar right after Labor Day, I finally found the courage to push back.
“With all due respect, that Monday is Labor Day – a holiday celebrating workers and giving them a break,” I said. “Scheduling a massive deadline right after that goes against the entire spirit of the holiday.”
My boss grumbled but eventually agreed to delay the launch by a full week. Sometimes you just have to speak up for the sanctity of a day off!
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Last year I invited my new neighbors Bob and Sue over for a Labor Day barbecue. They arrived right on time carrying a huge platter of hamburgers.
“We wanted to contribute something since you’re hosting,” Sue said. “But don’t worry – we pre-made the patties earlier so we wouldn’t have to labor on Labor Day!”
Bob then handed me an ice cold beer and said, “Now let’s get this celebration of rest and relaxation started!” After that I knew we’d get along just fine.
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My parents were going on and on about their typical jam-packed Labor Day weekend plans. “We’re ripping up the carpet, painting the garage, cleaning the attic…”
Finally I said, “Why don’t you take it easy this year? Order takeout, watch a movie marathon, lounge around in your PJs all day!”
They thought for a moment and said, “You’re right. We could all use a break!” And that’s the story of how my workaholic parents’ Labor Day became a day of leisure for once!
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The first year I lived on my own, I invited my three best friends over for a Labor Day barbecue. As the host, I handled all the cooking while they relaxed with some cold ones.
While flipping burgers, I jokingly shouted, “You guys just sit there while I slave over this hot grill!”
My friend Sam grinned and said, “Hey, it’s Labor Day – we’re just honoring the holiday by not laboring!” They’re lucky they’re my best buds.