53 Funny Goose Puns

Goose Puns

1. What do you call a goose that flies upside down? A silly goose!
2. Why was the goose embarrassed? It was caught with its down around its feet.
3. What’s a goose’s favorite cheese? Gouda!
4. How did the goose get arrested? It was caught honking under the influence.
5. Why don’t geese make good teachers? They always give out fowl assignments.
6. What do you call a group of geese who share an apartment? Room-mates.
7. Why don’t geese buy more books? They just re-read the ones they have over and over.
8. How do geese get to school? They catch the flock bus.
9. Why did the goose cross the road halfway? She wanted to take it one step at a time.
10. What do you call a wet goose who does magic? A damp houdini.
11. Why don’t geese make good criminals? They always leave a trail of breadcrumbs.

Goose One-Liners

12. A goose in time saves nine.
13. A wild goose never lays golden eggs.
14. If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s probably a goose in disguise.
15. The early goose gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
16. Even a swooping goose can’t catch two worms.
17. A goose flew off with my nest egg and now my retirement plans are cooked.
18. That’s a silly goose chase – the silliest.
19. If your goose is cooked, order takeout.
20. A goose in the hand is worth ten on the pond.
21. Don’t count your goslings before they hatch.

Best Goose Jokes

22. What do you get if you cross a goose with a ghost? A bird that scares itself!
23. My friend saw a man chasing a goose in the park. She said “What are you doing?” The man said “This goose stole my wallet!” My friend didn’t believe him. She thought he was just on a wild goose chase.
24. Why don’t geese drink coffee? Because it keeps them a-wakening.
25. Yesterday I saw my neighbor yelling at a goose in his yard. He was furious because the goose had pooped all over his freshly mowed lawn. He said to the goose “Don’t you dare come on my property again!” The goose just looked at him calmly and replied “Say no more.”
26. I was hanging out at the park when I saw a man sneaking up on a goose. Right before he grabbed it, the goose spun around and scared him so bad he fell into the lake! Guess that teaches him not to goose around.
27. My friend brought her pet goose with her when she visited me last weekend. That silly goose got loose and wandered all over the neighborhood honking at people until animal control had to come catch it. We sure had an entertaining goose chase trying to get it back!
28. Why don’t geese tell jokes when they fly in V-formation? Because they would crack each other up and break formation.
29. What do you call a gangster goose? A baaad mother gander.
30. Yesterday my friend saw a goose attacking a man in the park. The goose was pecking him and flapping its wings in the man’s face. My friend yelled “Hey, stop that right now!” Amazingly, the goose backed off. I guess it knew to stop when it was given a warning honk.
31. I took my kids to feed the geese at the park. One goose got a little too aggressive while I was handing out breadcrumbs. He nipped at my son and stole the whole bag! He was such a greedy gander.

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