Fishing Puns
1. What do you call a fish that knows addition and subtraction? A math-e-fish-ian!
2. What did the fish say when it hit the concrete wall? Dam!
3. What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant? Swimming trunks!
4. Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools!
5. What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated!
6. I was thinking about going fishing, but I realized my tackle box is a little… lackluster.
7. What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? “Dam!”
8. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
9. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, “Dam!”
10. What do you call a dangerous fish who supplies weapons? An arms di-eel-er!
11. What do you call a fish that only eats insects? A tackle bait box!
12. Why don’t oysters like to share their pearls? Because they’re shellfish!
Fishing One-Liners
13. I’m not a great fisherman, but I do enjoy the halibut.
14. My favorite part about fishing is just winging it.
15. I once caught a fish this big, but you’ll just have to take my word for it.
16. The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the reel.
17. Fishing relaxes me. It’s like yoga, except I still get to kill something.
18. If fishing is a religion, fly fishing is high church.
19. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
20. A bad day of fishing is still better than a good day at work.
21. I fish, therefore I am.
22. Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.
Best Fishing Jokes
23. My friend invited me on a fishing trip, but he didn’t say it was ice fishing. When I arrived, he handed me a pole, an ice pick, and a coal miner’s helmet. That was my first tip off.
24. A couple goes on vacation to a fishing resort in northern Minnesota. When they enter the cabin, the husband says, “Honey, have you ever seen such a huge bed? We could fit all of our friends in this!” The wife replies, “Well, we might as well. The brochure said there’s no fish in this damn lake.”
25. My friend took me out fishing, but after hours of waiting I complained, “We haven’t even gotten a nibble!” My friend replied, “Oh no, they told me this was a catch and release lake.”
26. Two guys are fishing in a boat when one of them drops his wallet in the water. His buddy quickly grabs a fishing net and starts sweeping the water. After about 20 minutes of sweeping the friend says, “You might as well stop, man. Your entire wallet was in there so all your cash is ruined, your credit cards are wrecked, and your driver’s license is done for.” The other guy replies, “Yeah, but at least I got my photo!”
27. My grandpa loves fishing, but the sport bores me to death. I’m not a big fan of catch and re-leisure activity.
28. Did you hear about the new corduroy pillowcases? They’re making headlines!
29. What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? Dam!
30. I tried catching some fog earlier. I mist.
31. They say there’s plenty of fish in the sea. But until I catch one, the only thing getting hooked up around here is my phone to its charger.
32. Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side? He’s all right now.
33. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
34. What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
35. I wanted to learn to drive a stick shift, but I couldn’t find a manual.
36. Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm.
37. What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A labracadabrador.
38. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
39. Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents.
40. What’s the best thing about living in Switzerland? Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.
41. Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.
42. I knew I shouldn’t steal a mixer from Walmart, but it was a whisk I was willing to take.
43. Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing? In case they get a hole in one!
44. Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.
45. Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb!
46. Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.
47. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!
