Dumbbell Puns
1. I was feeling weak, so I started lifting some dumbbells. It was a weighty decision, but I’m pumped about getting stronger.
2. My friend said she uses dumbbells to tone her arms. I said, “That sounds dumb, bell.”
3. I asked the trainer if we could use lighter dumbbells for our workout. She said, “Don’t be a dumb bell, you need to lift heavy to build muscle.”
4. I was excited to start lifting dumbbells until I realized I’m more of a smartbell kind of guy.
5. I prefer using dumbbells with intellectual discussions printed on them. Smartbells are the way to go if you ask me.
6. Why was the dumbbell unhappy? It felt like it was being used for shallow purposes.
7. The dumbbell rack was feeling neglected, so I made an effort to spend more time with it and get pumped up.
8. The strongest dumbbell is the one that lifts your spirits.
9. Dumbbells may build your muscles, but kindness builds lasting relationships. Choose wisely what you lift.
10. My dumbbells were feeling lonely, so I introduced them to the treadmill. Now they have a new running partner.
11. If dumbbells could talk, they would remind you to lift safely and with proper form.
12. Don’t be a dumbbell – remember to wipe down the equipment after you use it!
Dumbbell One-Liners
13. My arms were sore after lifting dumbbells, but it was a pain that I gained from.
14. They say you can’t judge a dumbbell by its cover, but the weight usually gives it away.
15. I ordered fast food after my dumbbell workout – guess I’m into lifts and fries!
16. Lifting dumbbells is a great workout, unless you’re a dumb bell like me!
17. Dumbbells before date night? My arms will be toned and I’ll have plenty of muscle to flex.
18. Just lifted some dumbbells and now I’m feeling pumped – both my muscles and my ego!
19. My arms hurt so much from lifting dumbbells yesterday that it feels like someone’s numb-bellringing them constantly.
20. Dumbbells don’t lift themselves – but I wish they did after today’s intense arm workout!
21. I’m glad I started lifting dumbbells – it’s helping me develop dumb bells of steel!
22. My coworker tried to prank me by replacing my dumbbells with balloons – what a dumb bell!
Best Dumbbell Jokes
23. I was struggling to lift the heavy dumbbells at the gym when suddenly one of them spoke: “Come on, lift me! Feel the burn!” I quickly realized my workout partner was hiding inside and playing a prank on me.
24. I was doing bicep curls with a dumbbell when I accidentally dropped it on my foot. I limped over to the trainer and said, “I think this dumbbell is broken, it really hurt my foot.” He glanced at me and said, “That’s because you’re supposed to lift with your arms, not your feet!”
25. My friend joined a new gym and told me all they have is dumbbells, no barbells whatsoever. I said, “That sounds odd, what kind of gym only has dumbbells?” He replied, “Planet Fitness.” Then he paused and said, “Wait, I think I misunderstood the name…”
26. I was struggling to open a jar when my personal trainer friend saw me and said, “Here, let me help you get that open.” He took the jar, gritted his teeth, flexed his arms and grunted loudly like he was lifting heavy weights. After 30 seconds of his “workout” he handed the still-sealed jar back to me and said, “Whew, that was a tough one. I think you should be able to open it now.”
27. I asked the trainer at the gym if he could recommend a good workout routine for me. He said, “First, do 10 reps of dumbbell shrugs, 10 reps of dumbbell rows, and 10 reps of pullovers.” I replied, “That sounds great, but I have no idea what any of those are. Can you demo them for me?” The trainer looked at me and said, “Yeah, I don’t actually know what those are either, I was hoping if I sounded convincing enough you’d just trust me.”
28. Why did the dumbbell prefer lifts over stairs? Because it liked getting pumped!
29. Why don’t dumbbells ever get cold? They always have a little weight on them!
30. Why did the dumbbell cross the road? To get to the other side and work the opposing muscle group!
31. Why can’t dumbbells ever keep a secret? Because they’re always spilling the tea!
32. Did you hear about the angry dumbbell? It was mad because it felt used!
33. Did you hear about the time the dumbbells unionized? They demanded lighter workloads!
34. What do you call a music group made up of dumbbells? Dumb Bell Air!
35. Why don’t dumbbells make good philosophers? Because they always focus on the weighty matters!
36. What sits besides a dumbbell and tells bad jokes? A comedy clubbell!
37. Why was the dumbbell late to work? It took too long to get pumped up!
38. Why do dumbbells make great detectives? Because they can always crack the case!
39. Why do dumbbells make bad Uber drivers? They take too many wrong turns!
40. What do you call a detective dumbbell? Sher-lift Holmes!
41. Why couldn’t the dumbbell think of a Halloween costume? It was stumped!
42. Where do dumbbells enjoy vacationing? The gym resort of Muscle Beach!
43. Why was the little dumbbell sad? It felt like all its work was for nothing!
44. What sits beside a dumbbell and knits all day? A stay-at-home barbell!
45. Why do dumbbells make the best basketball players? Because they’re great at lifts and hoists!
46. Why are dumbbells so humble? They don’t lift themselves up!
47. What do you call an intellectual dumbbell? A thinkbell!
48. What do you call a group of joking dumbbells? A stand-up comedy club!
49. Why do dumbbells make bad singers? They’re always tone deaf!
50. Why was the dumbbell fired from the gym? Lack of work ethic!