Scarf Puns (15) 1. I knitted a really long scarf, you could say it’s in-knit-ly long! 2. My friend was cold so I lent him my favorite scarf. I hope he returns it, I’d hate to have a falling crochet! 3. I was going to buy a new scarf but couldn’t find the one I …
Random Jokes
Salad spinner Puns 1. I was going to make a joke about salad spinners, but it would just be spinning its wheels. 2. My friend bought a new salad spinner. I told him it sounds like it will make his life a lot more tossed around. 3. I entered my salad spinner in a race. …
Measuring Cup Puns (16) 1. I asked my friend if she wanted to hear a joke about measuring cups. She said, “Make it a tall one!” 2. Did you hear about the angry measuring cup? It was always getting steamed. 3. My measuring cups were feeling down, so I tried to lift their spirits. But …
Mail Puns (10) I ordered a boomerang from Australia. I’ve been waiting for weeks but my mail just keeps going back. Working at the post office has its ups and downs. But more downs than ups if you ask me. Did you hear about the angry envelope? It had a lot of stamping fits. Did …
Phone book Puns 1. I tried to look up a plumber in the yellow pages, but all the information was tearable. 2. I was feeling lonely so I called up my old friend’s number in the phone book, but we just didn’t connect like we used to. 3. I opened up the phone book to …
Perfume Puns 1. I tried to make my own perfume yesterday but it ended up smelling cologne. 2. I was going to make a perfume joke, but it stinks. 3. Why was the perfume arrested? It was guilty of fragrance. 4. I bought my girlfriend some perfume that smelled like peppers and spices. It was …
Pencil Sharpener Puns 1. I bought an electric pencil sharpener, but it keeps giving me the cold shoulder. 2. My pencil sharpener identifies as non-binary – it goes by blade/blade-self pronouns. 3. I was going to make a joke about pencil sharpeners, but it’s pointless. 4. What did the pencil say to the sharpener? You’ve …
Tape Puns (20) What do you call tape that doesn’t stick well? Sub-standard adhesive! Why can’t tape be vain? It’s always stuck on itself! My friend got trapped inside a tape factory. He said it was inescapable confinement. I entered my tape measure in a marathon. It unraveled after 26 miles. Want to hear a …
Jug Puns 1. I was at a party and someone said, “Let’s play a game!” I said, “Okay, jug or not!” They looked at me confused and said, “I think you mean truth or dare.” I said, “Nope, I definitely meant jug or not. That’s my favorite game where you guess if something is a …
Gloves Puns I asked the glove maker if business was going well. She said it has its ups and downs. The boxer entered the ring wearing bright red gloves. I guess you could say he was ready to deliver some punch lines. I saw a help wanted sign at the hand wear store that said …