Clothing Iron Puns (12) I was going to make a joke about ironing clothes, but it came out looking too flat. I bought my wife a new iron for her birthday. I told her it cost me an arm and a leg, but don’t worry—I got it for a steal! Why don’t irons make good …
Random Jokes
Eraser Puns 1. I made a mistake at work, but thankfully I had my eraser to rub it out. 2. My friend got angry when I borrowed his eraser without asking. I guess he just needed to rub it off. 3. I entered my eraser into a bodybuilding competition. It won first prize for having …
Sofa Puns (12) I bought a sofa that turns into a bed. It’s very convenient for when guests stay over. You could say it’s a sleeper sofa. My new sofa came with cup holders and built-in speakers. You could say it’s a sofa with all the fix-ins. I spilled juice on my fabric sofa. Now …
Clock Puns (16) 1. I fired my clockmaker because he was always running late. I guess he needed to re-watch his timing. 2. I brought my broken clock to get fixed, but the clockmaker refused. I guess he doesn’t have the time. 3. Did you hear about the clock that was arrested? It was charged …
Pocket Watch Puns (15) 1. I was running late to my watchmaker class, but I managed to make up for lost time. 2. My pocket watch collection is very valuable. You could say it’s priceless…unlike my regular watch collection. 3. I brought my broken pocket watch to get fixed, but the repairman said he didn’t …
Dust pan Puns 1. I bought a new dust pan that came with a mini broom. You could say it’s the little sweeper that could. 2. My dust pan has seen better days. You could say it’s past its prime. 3. I was cleaning up a mess in the kitchen when my dust pan broke. …
Socks Puns (20) I asked my socks why they were fighting. They said it was because they didn’t get along. My socks told me to stop walking all over them. I guess they were feeling down-trodden. I entered my socks in a race. Unfortunately, they ended up getting disqualified for illegal use of perforations. I …
Clipboard Puns (12) I entered a contest for best clipboard design. I didn’t win first prize, but I got an honorable menu-tion! My friend was bragging about his new diamond-encrusted clipboard. I told him it sounds very expen-sive…he said “Yeah, it cost a pretty penny.” I use my clipboard to chop onions when I cook. …
Pocket Knife Puns (15) 1. I was looking for my pocket knife yesterday but couldn’t find it. I guess you could say it was a cutlery emergency. 2. My friend got me a pocket knife for my birthday. I told him, “Thanks a blade!” 3. Did you hear about the angry pocket knife? It had …
Dumbbell Puns 1. I was feeling weak, so I started lifting some dumbbells. It was a weighty decision, but I’m pumped about getting stronger. 2. My friend said she uses dumbbells to tone her arms. I said, “That sounds dumb, bell.” 3. I asked the trainer if we could use lighter dumbbells for our workout. …