Jump Rope Puns I entered a jump rope competition last week but I didn’t make the cut. My friend was bragging about his jump rope skills, but I think he was just stringing me along. I bought a glow in the dark jump rope so I can skip to my heart’s content. The skipper was …
Random Jokes
Jacket Puns I was cold so I put on my jacket. You could say I was feeling a little off-vest. My friend got a reversible jacket. He says he can’t wait to turn it inside out, so he can see the new side of it. I entered my jacket in a comedy competition. I think …
ID Card Puns (15) I tried to use my library card as ID to get into a bar. The bouncer said, “Sorry, no books allowed.” Working as an ID checker is not my dream job, but it will get me through the door. I lost my ID card, but I’m not too worried. My identity …
Ice Cube Tray Puns (15) I bought an ice cube tray that makes spheres instead of cubes. You could say it helps me get a-round. My ice cube tray isn’t working properly. I think it’s having a meltdown. I was thinking of upgrading to a fancy ice cube tray with shapes, but decided to stick …
Nail file Puns 1. I used to work at a nail salon but had to quit because I just couldn’t handle the daily file. 2. My friend got mad when I borrowed her nail file without asking. I should have known it was a touchy subject. 3. I entered my nail file in a beauty …
Mug Puns 1. I bought a mug that says “World’s Best Dad” on it, but I never use it because I don’t have any kids. It just sits in my cupboard collecting dust. What a waste of mug-ney. 2. My friend got really mad when I accidentally broke his favorite mug. I told him to …
Movie Puns 1. I heard they’re making a movie about clocks. It’s about time! 2. I tried to watch a double feature at the theater, but after the first movie I was done watching films for awhile. I needed a cinematic break. 3. Did you hear about the new superhero movie coming out? It’s called …
Mousepad Puns 1. I bought a mousepad with a picture of cheese on it. It was pretty gouda. 2. My friend got a mousepad with a cat on it. I told him it looks pawsome. 3. I wanted a mousepad with a beach scene, but the store was all out. It was a real coastal …
Mop Puns I bought a new mop to clean my floors. You could say it was a clean sweep. My friend asked to borrow my mop. I told him he could have it on loan. Did you hear about the janitor who entered a mop into a beauty contest? It swept the competition! I was …
File folder Puns I asked my friend if he wanted to organize his papers, but he said he didn’t want to get foldered into anything right now. My wife said I had too many file folders lying around the house. I told her to stop flapping her folder about nothing! I entered my tabby cat …