Karaoke Puns
1. I wanted to sing at karaoke night, but I didn’t have the vocals for it.
2. The karaoke machine had a malfunction and started playing songs in the wrong key. It was quite the lyric crisis.
3. I’m too shy to sing karaoke. I guess you could say I lack stage presence.
4. My friend was nervous about singing karaoke, but I told him to just wing it. What’s the worst that could happen?
5. I tried to sing karaoke after having one too many drinks. Let’s just say it wasn’t my most pitch perfect performance.
6. I wanted to perform at the karaoke bar, but they said the mic was only for singers. I felt so rejected.
7. Karaoke always reminds me of American Idol rejections. So many delusional people who can’t sing.
8. The karaoke DJ told me I was a little pitchy. I told him being a DJ doesn’t make him Simon Cowell.
9. I’m getting tired of the same old songs at karaoke night. We need some fresh material in the rotation!
10. I tried to rap Nicki Minaj at karaoke night. Let’s just say I needed to Super Bass up my skills.
Karaoke One-Liners
11. Karaoke is where tone deaf dreams go to die.
12. Karaoke night is amateur hour for wanna-be singers.
13. Forget pitch perfect, karaoke is more like pitch pathetic.
14. Karaoke is my chance to butcher songs in front of an audience.
15. Alcohol and karaoke go together like drunk and disorderly.
16. Karaoke is what happens when shower singers get ambitious.
17. Karaoke night is my audition for America’s Worst Singers.
18. Karaoke: ruining songs one drunk person at a time.
19. Warning: excessive karaoke may result in hearing loss.
20. Karaoke – cheaper than therapy, but you get what you pay for.
Best Karaoke Jokes
21. I decided to sing “I Will Always Love You” at karaoke night. About 30 seconds in, a guy in the back yelled “No you won’t!” and I got booed off stage.
22. My friends forced me to sing karaoke with them even though they know I can’t sing. I got up on stage and started belting out “I Will Survive” horribly off-key. Suddenly the DJ cut the music, glared at me and said “No you won’t. Get off my stage.”
23. I was at a karaoke bar and this guy got up and started singing “Sweet Caroline” really drunk and slurring all the words. After about a minute of this torture, the DJ grabbed the mic and said “No more sweet
caroline for you tonight. Let’s give someone else a turn.”
24. During a particularly painful rendition of “Bohemian Rhapsody” at karaoke night, the bartender went up and smashed the guy’s karaoke machine mid-song. He screamed “No more!” as the guy kept feebly singing acapella and out of tune.
25. My tone-deaf coworker signed up to sing “Don’t Stop Believin'” at karaoke for the office party. He was so bad that 20 seconds in people started throwing fruit and booing until he gave up and left the stage in shame.
26. I decided to rap some 50 Cent at karaoke which I immediately realized was a mistake. After getting booed, the DJ said “More like 50 Pesos, get off my stage fool!”
27. My friend tried to sing “Dancing Queen” in a high pitched falsetto at karaoke night. The DJ pulled the plug halfway through and said “Honey you ain’t no dancing queen.”
28. I attempted to sing “My Heart Will Go On” at a karaoke bar after having a few too many drinks. People started throwing popcorn and heckling until the bartender dragged me off stage while I was still slurring the lyrics drunkedly.
29. I signed up to sing Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin'” at a karaoke bar, confident that I could nail it. 30 seconds in, the DJ muted my mic, shook his head and said “You didn’t even start believin’.”
30. I enthusiastically volunteered to sing “I Love Rock N’ Roll” at my office karaoke party. My tone-deaf rendition was so cringey that my boss cut the music and said, “With singing like that, you’ll only ever love unemployment.” Ouch.
31. My friends dared me to sing “Listen to Your Heart” at a crowded karaoke bar. Let’s just say no one was listening after I started shrilly massacring the notes. The DJ had to cut me off mid-verse because people were booing so loudly.
32. I attempted Freddie Mercury’s part in “Bohemian Rhapsody” at a karaoke night. People started throwing food yelling “No, no, no!” By the time I got to “Galileo Figaro,” the DJ pushed me off stage to stop the musical torture.
33. The emcee at karaoke night introduced me as “Our next American Idol!” I confidently took the stage to sing “Don’t Rain on My Parade.” 30 excruciating seconds later, he snatched back the mic saying, “On second thought, definitely not American Idol material.”