Chicken Puns 1. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! 2. What do you call a chicken who counts her eggs? A mathemachicken. 3. Why doesn’t a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on its head! 4. Why did the chicken go to KFC? To see a chicken …
Susan Parker
Black Cat Puns (15) 1. What do you call a black cat who only eats cheese? A brie-ony! 2. Why don’t black cats go fishing? They’re afraid of the catfish! 3. What do you call a black cat who does martial arts? A cat-rate master! 4. Why don’t black cats make good editors? They always …
Beer Puns I was going to tell you a beer pun, but I decided it was too corny. My friend got fired from the brewery. His boss said he lacked beer judgement. The beer was brewed by monks, so we called it friar ale. Did you hear about the beer that was made specifically for …
Aloha Puns 1. I heard Hawaii has a big aloha party coming up. It’s going to be a real luau blowout! 2. My friend got a job selling Aloha shirts in Honolulu. I told him it sounds like an excel-aloha opportunity. 3. I was feeling down so I decided to book a Hawaiian vacation. The …
Mozzarella Puns 1. What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you? Nacho cheese! 2. What kind of cheese do you use to disguise a small horse? Mascarpone! 3. Why did the cheese want to borrow money? It needed some cheddar! 4. Why was the cheesemaker fired from his job? He got caught stringing …
Star Trek Puns 1. I heard the Enterprise got a new captain. I guess you could say there’s a Picard in charge now. 2. I was going to make a joke about the Borg, but I figured resistance is futile. 3. The Klingons wanted to capture the Enterprise, but their plan was foiled. Get it? …
Leaves Puns (25) 1. I wanted to make a leaf collection, but autumn I could get were piles. 2. The tree held on to its leaves tightly. It just couldn’t let go. 3. I entered my leaf collection in a contest. It was a photo finish. 4. I told a joke about leaves, but it …
Lizard Puns (25) What do you call a lizard that sells insurance? A geico! What do you call a lizard that works as a spy? A secret agent iguana. Why are lizards bad at playing musical instruments? They’re reptiles. What do you call a lizard that likes to body build? A flexi-guana. My friend got …
Door Puns 1. I wanted to go to the party but the host kept me in the doorway. 2. I heard a knock at the door so I opened it. No one was there except a little quiche on the floor with a note saying “Lettuce in.” 3. What do you call someone who is …
Fig Puns I wanted to make a fig pie but couldn’t find the right fig-ures. The fig fell out of the tree. It was an unripe fig-ment of my imagination. My fig tree wasn’t growing well so I gave it some fig-tilizer. The fig washer wasn’t working. It needed a new fig-ter. I entered my …