Tea Kettle Puns I bought a singing tea kettle, but it went flat after a few weeks. Now it just produces minor key-ttles. My tea kettle is very possessive. It gets mad if I use any other pots or pans. I guess it just wants all the at-ten-tion. I entered my tea kettle in a …
Angela Rodriguez
Scarf Puns (15) 1. I knitted a really long scarf, you could say it’s in-knit-ly long! 2. My friend was cold so I lent him my favorite scarf. I hope he returns it, I’d hate to have a falling crochet! 3. I was going to buy a new scarf but couldn’t find the one I …
Playing Card Puns 1. I tried to organize a poker tournament but it fell apart when the deck of cards refused to deal with me. 2. My friend got a full house in poker, but I told him not to get too excited because his family was already living with him. 3. I entered a …
Hose Puns (13) 1. I bought a new hose that is made out of a special rubber that doesn’t kink. You could say it has a very flexible personality. 2. My hose got a hole in it but I patched it up with some duct tape. You could say it had a rip in its …
Broom Puns What do you call a witch who drops her broom while flying? Broomless! Why don’t brooms fly well when they’re tired? They get sweepy! My broom got sick after flying in the rain. Now it has the sweep flu! What do you call a broom that graduated top of its class? A sweep-a …
Bible Puns (15) 1. I Noah guy who can help me understand the ark story. He’s a real animal expert! 2. Reading the begats is so boring. I guess you could call them the be-GATS-me sections of the Bible. 3. I wanted to read about Jericho but I got walls blocked. Guess I’ll have to …
Rake Puns 1. I bought a new rake to help with the fall cleanup, but it ended up being a huge mis-rake! 2. My friend was bragging about raking faster than me. I told him not to rake me over the coals about it! 3. The landscaper started telling rake puns that were pretty corny. …
Suitcase Puns I was going to tell a joke about suitcases, but it had too much baggage. My suitcase is stuffed to the seams. You could say it’s having a little bag crisis. I was going to pack light for my trip, but my suitcases were too heavy. The airline lost my luggage. Now I’m …
Scanner Puns I was going to tell a joke about scanners, but I figured you wouldn’t find it very engaging. My scanner identification technology is so advanced, I can ID any person in 0.000001 seconds flat. You could say I have scary fast facial recognition. My new scanner came with a see-through lid. Now that’s …
Washer Puns I was going to buy a new washer, but I decided to keep the old one. I have a lot of clean laundry with that appliance and didn’t want to throw it out just for the spin cycle. Our washer plays songs while it runs. You could say it has its own built-in …
