60 Sidesplitting Shovel Jokes

Shovel Puns

1. I was trying to dig a hole with a broken shovel, but I was getting nowhere fast. I guess you could say I was making no digress.
2. I entered my shovel into a beauty pageant. It was up against some tough completion, but in the end it won by a landslide.
3. My shovel started telling bad jokes while I was gardening. I said “That’s enough of your shovelware!”
4. I was out metal detecting with my shovel and found some old coins. I guess you could say I was in it for the dig money!
5. I accidentally left my shovel outside in the rain. Now it’s all rusted. But on the bright shovel, a little rust never hurt anyone!
6. Did you hear about the angry shovel? It literally flipped out on someone!
7. Did you hear about the shovel that got a job as a reporter? It was quite the scoop!
8. My shovel and I entered a three-legged race. We didn’t win, but we gave it our best dig.
9. I couldn’t find my shovel this morning. It had completely dug out on me.
10. Did you hear about the shovel that travelled back in time? I guess you could say it had a lot of backdigging to do!

Shovel One-Liners

11. My shovel just broke after 10 years…that hit me right in the feels.
12. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes at his dumb shovel jokes.
13. I was wondering why my shovel was getting dull, then it finally dawned on me.
14. My shovel loved knock-knock jokes, but it always gave away the punchline by cracking up first.
15. My shovel was useless on our camping trip; it kept telling awful ghost stories and was terrified to go to the latrine alone at night.
16. Forget love stories, I’d rather hear about two shovels meeting cute at Home Depot.
17. How do shovels show appreciation? They dig you a lot.
18. As jokes go, I’d give that last shovel one about a 3/10.
19. I just tripped over my shovel…now I’m really digging myself into a hole here.
20. I was going to tell a shovel joke, but I decided to bury it instead.

Best Shovel Jokes

21. My friend was trying to dig a hole with a shovel, but the ground was really rocky and he was struggling. I said to him “Buddy, it looks like you’re really hitting rock bottom with that shovel!”
22. Why was the shovel grumpy? Because everyone kept piling more work on top of it!
23. Did you hear about the celebrity shovel who was caught shoplifting? The headline read “Famous Digger Nicks Spade”!
24. I accidentally left my shovel out in the rain last night. This morning it was gone and there was just a hole where I left it. I think my shovel literally dug itself.
25. What do you call a psychic midget escaped convict with a shovel? A small medium at large digging around.
26. Why do shovels make great detectives? Because they love to dig up dirt!
27. My shovel and I were gardening when we uncovered an old chest. Inside was a map to buried treasure, so now we’re going on a dig quest!
28. Did you hear about the shovel that had its portrait painted? The artist really captured its dig-nity!
29. Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up literally everything shovel!
30. What concert costs only 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback (nickel back dig dig).
31. My mathematician friend got frustrated trying to measure the depth and volume of a hole he was digging. I said “Calm down, you’re getting worked up over a grave issue!”
32. Why do shovels make great dancers? They know how to dig down deep and get low!
33. A retirement home was having a talent show, but the elderly man who signed up to do stand-up comedy with his shovel got cold feet and dropped out at the last minute. I guess you could say he got stage freight.
34. My friend bet me $20 I couldn’t name 20 shovel brands. I promptly listed 13 and he angrily handed me the money. I guess you could say I totally Spade him!
35. Why was the shovel silent during the meeting? It was totally spaced out!
36. What do you call a shovel band? Hole diggers!
37. My shovel loves listening to classical music while gardening. Its favorite composer is Wolfgang Digmadeus Mozshovel!
38. Did you hear about the injured shovel that became addicted to pain medication? It got hooked on oxydiggin!
39. Two shovels walk into an antique shop and accidentally knock over a vase. The owner yells “Hey, watch your digging!”
40. My shovel friend met a girl shovel at Home Depot and it was love at first dig. But sadly she ghosted him after their first date.
41. What did the shovel say to console his friend going through bankruptcy? “Don’t worry buddy, this too shall dig pass.”
42. My shovel tried its hand at stand up comedy last night but it turns out its sense of humor was pretty sophomoric and dirt-y.
43. I told my shovel it should go into contracting work. It said it would consider the proposal but would need to dig deeper into what that would entangle.

I hope you enjoyed those 60+ sidesplitting shovel jokes! Let me dig up some more for you next time.