Traffic Cone Puns
1. What do you call a traffic cone that works as a barber? A cone cut!
2. Why was the traffic cone late to work? It got stuck in cone-struction traffic!
3. Why don’t traffic cones go on vacation? They don’t want to leave their cone-try!
4. What do you call a traffic cone that moonlights as a rapper? Cone-ye West!
5. Why don’t traffic cones like hot weather? It makes them melt into puddles of or-cone juice!
6. How do traffic cones stay connected? With cone-tact lists!
7. What did the mama traffic cone say to her baby? You’ll always cone first!
8. Why was the traffic cone crying? It got cone-dumped!
9. What’s a traffic cone’s favorite county? O-cone-e County!
10. Why do traffic cones make good dancers? They know how to cone-trol their bodies!
Traffic Cone One-Liners
11. I tried dressing up as a traffic cone for Halloween but it turns out the costume was cone-stricting.
12. I used to be addicted to stealing traffic cones, but I’m cone clean now.
13. That traffic cone is so bright it’s practically glow-cone.
14. I’m thinking of opening a restaurant called Traffic Cones – We Serve Cones!
15. I failed my driving test for running over too many traffic cones – who knew cone safety was so important!
16. My friend got fired from the highway department for stealing traffic cones to make cone art.
17. If Netflix made a show about traffic cones, they’d call it Orange is the New Cone.
18. Never ask a traffic cone for directions, they’ll just point you in a cone-fusing direction.
19. Traffic cones may not look like much, but they have an important cone-tribution to make.
20. My dog keeps trying to mark his territory on traffic cones – he must think they’re hy-cone-drants!
Best Traffic Cone Jokes
21. A police officer pulled over a traffic cone for reckless driving. The cone said “Come on officer, you know me – I’m cone-stantly safe!”
22. What’s the difference between a divided highway and a traffic cone? One has a barrier in the middle, and the other is a bare cone!
23. My friend got a job recovering stolen traffic cones. The first day he saw one in a driveway and knocked on the door to ask for it back. A kid answered and said “Yeah that’s cone of ours.”
24. I was driving down a highway lined with traffic cones and suddenly had an existential crisis – what if they weren’t cones, but were actually screaming souls trapped in this purgatory we call life? What if we’re all just traffic cones, directing others while never reaching our true destination?
25. Yesterday I saw a traffic cone in a suit and tie walking down the street. I asked him “Where are you going all dressed up?” He replied “I’m going to my cone-ference.”
26. What’s the most sensitive part of a traffic cone? The cone zone.
27. Why do teenage traffic cones hate mornings so much? Because they’re cone-stantly tired from staying up too late!
28. How does a traffic cone search the internet? On Google Ch-cone.
29. What’s a traffic cone’s favorite type of music? Anything, as long as it’s played at high de-cone-bels!
30. Why aren’t traffic cones allowed in public pools? Because they always end up floating to the cone-cession stand!
More Traffic Cone Puns
31. What do you call two traffic cones that are dating? Cone-namored!
32. Why can’t traffic cones keep secrets? Because everything goes in cone-fidence!
33. Did you hear about the new social network for traffic cones? It’s called Conetworking.
34. How do traffic cones stay in shape during winter? Snowcone workouts.
35. Why do traffic cones make great gifts? They come pre-cone-wrapped.
36. What’s a traffic cone’s least favorite day of the week? Cone-day, because it reminds them of blue cones-day.
37. Why don’t eggs tell jokes to traffic cones? They’d just get cone-diments in return.
38. What’s a traffic cone’s favorite kitchen appliance? The cone-vection oven.
39. How does a traffic cone party? By cone-gregating with friends.
40. Why are traffic cones so bad at playing hide and seek? They’re always easy to cone-spy.
More Traffic Cone One-Liners
41. I was late to work because a traffic cone was blocking the parking lot entrance – he just refused to budge cone inch!
42. Today I saw a sad traffic cone sitting in the rain – he looked so cone-tented just staying dry under his little vest.
43. Make sure to obey those traffic cones – they’re cone-stantly watching.
44. That bright orange traffic cone really holds his own in the cone-struction site banter.
45. I’ll never understand people who steal traffic cones to go cone-ing – it just seems so reckless.
46. Watch out for fake psychic traffic cones – they’ll just take your money and give generic cone-dictions.
47. Traffic cones may look casual, but they take their jobs very cone-scientiously.
48. I wouldn’t mess with those traffic cones – they can be surprisingly cone-frontational.
49. That traffic cone is so old, he knew Burger King when he was still a cone-prince.
50. I saw a tourist asking a traffic cone for directions – some folks just don’t recognize local cone-customs.
More Hilarious Traffic Cone Jokes
51. What do you call a line of traffic cones telling jokes? A cone-ga chain.
52. Did you hear about the new Netflix show Orange is the New Cone? It’s about traffic cones in prison.
53. What do you call a zombie traffic cone? The cone-dead!
54. A traffic cone walks into a bar. The bartender says, “You’re WEL-cone here, but I can’t serve you – you’re clearly in-toxic-cone-ted.”
55. What’s a traffic cone’s favorite sport? Cone-ball – it’s like baseball but you can cut corners.
56. Why do seagulls fly over traffic cones? For the cone-hal they drop!
57. What do you call a parade of clumsy traffic cones? A cone-ga line.
58. How do traffic cones get around town? Ride-cone services like Lyft and Uber.
59. Knock knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say traffic cone again!
I hope you enjoyed this wide-ranging selection of puns, one-liners, and jokes about everyone’s favorite roadside markers! Let me know if you need any more hilarious traffic cone humor for your website.
