I was going to buy an expensive electric toothbrush, but I decided to just stick with a manual one instead. I don’t like being brushed off.
My friend got a job at the toothbrush factory. It’s not glamorous work, but it pays the bills and puts food on the table. He said it’s a great way to make ends meet.
Did you hear about the angry toothbrush? It was absolutely bristling with rage!
My dentist told me I need to brush better. I told him not to brush me off so quickly.
I entered my pet toothbrush into a beauty pageant. I’m rooting for Miss Flossie!
Our family dentist is fond of bad puns. I guess you could say he makes a lot of money by the tooth.
I was going to tell a joke about an electric toothbrush, but it was too re-volting.
Did you know that toothbrushes with whitening gel work extra hard? Yeah, those guys really scrub til they’re blue in the face!
My dentist likes knock-knock jokes. But I think his delivery needs some polish.
Did you hear about the arrogant electric toothbrush? It was very abrasive and brash!
Brush One-Liners
Don’t brush me off so quickly – my dental hygiene advice is gold!
I was scrubbing so hard with my new toothbrush that sparks were flying – literally!
My dentist told me to brush gently, so now I lovingly caress my teeth with extra soft bristles.
This new rotating electric toothbrush scrubs from every angle – it’s positively revolting!
I brush my teeth religiously – you could say dental hygiene is my faith.
My toothbrush kicked the bucket – now I need to buy a new one so I can properly mop my teeth.
This toothbrush is so powerful it feels like getting a dental cleaning every time I brush!
I let my kid pick out my new toothbrush – she chose the one covered in glitter and sparkles.
My dentist says to brush softly, but I like to aggressively scrub my teeth.
I named my toothbrush Excalibur – together we heroically fight plaque and gingivitis!
Best Brush Jokes
Last week, I was feeling really tired and run down. I decided to book an appointment with my doctor to see if something was wrong. After running some tests, he determined that I had come down with a case of plaque build-up. He recommended that I improve my oral hygiene by brushing thoroughly with a soft bristled brush and flossing every day. What a relief – I was worried it might be something more serious! But with some diligent brushing, I should be back to normal in no time.
Did you hear about the man who loved toothbrushes so much he decided to marry one? The wedding was lovely, even if it was a bit odd for the guests. At the reception, the DJ played music and everyone danced the electric slide. The toothbrush blushed as all eyes turned to watch her scrub back and forth across the dance floor. For the honeymoon, she told her new husband she was most looking forward to their sunset brushes on the hotel balcony. All in all, while it wasn’t a traditional marriage, you could see the happy couple was positively beaming!
Why was the electric toothbrush so noisy that it got kicked out of the public library? It simply refused to brush quietly. Despite multiple attempts to encourage more discreet scrubbing, the high-powered toothbrush persisted with its obnoxious whirring. As pleas to “shhh!” were met with yet louder vibrations, the librarian had enough. “Out!” she demanded, whisking away the still-clattering contraption in defeat. Though initially resistant, even the electric toothbrush had to admit it was being unacceptably abrasive in such a quiet space.
I’ll never forget the day my beloved toothbrush was stolen right out of my bathroom. One minute it was there scrubbing happily beside the sink, and the next—vanished into thin air! I was so distraught I made “Missing Toothbrush” flyers and papered the whole neighborhood, offering a reward with no questions asked. For weeks, I sadly brushed with inferior loaner brushes that just didn’t have the same scrubbing power. Finally, months later, a neighbor knocked on my door holding a battered yet familiar plastic handle. “I think this belongs to you,” she said. As I was reunited with my trusty dental companion once more, I resolved never again to take my precious toothbrush for granted!
Why does my dentist keep telling me dad jokes during our appointments? Just yesterday, he had me groaning as he polished my teeth. “How do dentists stay cool during the summer?” he asked while adjusting his tools. “Air conditioning!” he quipped. As I wrinkled my nose, he breezily continued scaling the plaque from my molars. When it came time to rinse, he winked and said, “What did the dentist see at the North Pole? A molar bear!” My laughter echoed off the exam room walls as I shook my head. Sure, his jokes were corny, but I couldn’t help but grin through the goofiness. Something tells me our next cleaning session will bring a fresh round of cringey laughs.
My electric toothbrush broke last week and there must be something funky going on, because my apartment suddenly smells terrible! At first I didn’t make the connection and just figured my boyfriend had taken off his stinky shoes in the living room again. But no matter how much Febreze I sprayed or candles I lit, the smell persisted. Then this morning I went to brush my teeth and nearly gagged at my own dragon breath and plaque-coated tongue in the mirror! No wonder our apartment reeks – it’s my own mouth! Looks like I’ll be taking a trip to Target this afternoon to pick up a new toothbrush stat. I miss my squeaky clean mouth feeling and fresh, minty breath!
Why was the electric toothbrush acting so arrogant and self-important? It thought scrubbing teeth made it better than everyone else! The absurd delusions of grandeur went right to its handle. Bristling with hubris, the toothbrush looked down on its boring manual cousins rolling lazily back and forth. And don’t even get it started on disposable travel brushes – so useless! Clearly only the intense sonic vibrations of an electric brush could remove plaque and polish teeth to a professional shine. Yes, the crazy contraption thought itself a real VIP, vibrating vigorously through each self-aggrandizing cleaning session.
My young niece loves playing dentist and carefully brushing all her toys’ teeth. She gives each patient a check-up, poke around their mouths with her finger, then gets right to scrubbing. Her stuffed animals have the sparkliest smile in town with all the attention they get! The practice sessions can go on for hours until every last molar on every last animal is minty fresh. Maybe she actually does have a budding career in dentistry ahead of her! All I know is that she’d better not come at me with that miniature toothbrush – I draw the line at getting my own teeth cleaned by a five year old!
Why is my electric toothbrush always bragging about its cleaning abilities? Because it has massive bristles! This overconfident dental accessory is convinced no plaque stands a chance against its top-of-the-line scrubbing oscillations. It scoffs at lesser models rotating lazily at subpar speeds. Not even fancy whitening toothpastes can compare to its superior stain-fighting power, or so it claims. This pompous electric brush is so enamored with its own vibrations that it insists on bragging itself up through each entire two-minute cleaning session. Someone really needs to take this arrogant thing down a peg – just because you oscillate intensely doesn’t mean you’re better than everyone else!
After decades of use, my dear toothbrush passed away last night. It had valiantly maintained my dental hygiene since childhood – navigating every molar and bicuspid with care while chattering away happily. We shared laughs through thousands of messy misadventures together over the years – like the time I dropped it in the toilet or ran it through the dryer by accident. As the end drew near, its worn bristles could barely muster enough strength to scrub any more. Yet even then it vibrated bravely as I held it, determined to brighten my smile until the very last stroke. A part of me wishes science could have prolonged its life. But now all I can do is mourn my irreplaceable companion, smile sadly, and pick out a new toothbrush that will never truly fill its shoes.
After meeting my new boyfriend for the first time, my electric toothbrush developed an immediate crush! Smitten by his charisma and good looks, it now constantly gushes about my “dreamy hunk.” During every brushing session it vibrates delightedly while begging for updates – did he call me? Are we going on another date soon? When am I going to make things official and post cute pictures together? This lovestruck little dental accessory is driving me crazy! I wish it would respect boundaries and stop prying into my personal life. Maybe some space would help tone down its enthusiasm…or should I take the direct approach and wash its bristles out with soap?
