Frankenstein Puns 1. I heard Frankenstein entered a body building competition. He was disqualified for using artificial body parts though. 2. Did you hear about Frankenstein’s new career as a dairy farmer? He’s great at producing milk from screamin’ cows! 3. Frankenstein tried to start a lawn care business but he just couldn’t seem to …
Jennifer Martinez
4th of July Puns (10) 1. I wanted to have some fireworks for the 4th of July, but all the good ones argon. 2. Why did the firework get stopped by the police? It was letting off some illegal firecrackers! 3. What do you call an American visiting England on the 4th of July? Independence …
Zombie Puns What do you call a zombie who cooks stir fry? A brain wok. Why don’t zombies eat clowns? They taste funny. What do you call a zombie magician? A necro-mancer. How does a zombie prepare his food? He grave-robes it. Why do zombies make good gardeners? They’re great at dead-heading. What do you …
Gingerbread Puns 1. What do you call a gingerbread man with one leg shorter than the other? A gimpy gingerbread! 2. Why was the gingerbread man sad? He was feeling crumbly. 3. What do you call a gingerbread man in the summer? A melted mess. 4. Why does Santa like gingerbread houses so much? Because …
Alcohol Puns (10) 1. I tried making whiskey using grapes, but it came out pretty wine. 2. The bartender asked if I wanted my beer in a frozen mug. I told him, “No, just beer it to me!” 3. Did you hear about the Irishman who tried to brew beer in his kitchen but brewed …
Gold Puns (20) I bought some gold jewelry for my wife. It was an in-vest-mint. The gold miner was excavating a new shaft. He was going for the gold vein. The gold prospector struck it rich. Now he’s in ore of money. The gold thief got caught red-handed. He was booked for grand larceny. The …
Boxing Puns I heard the boxing match was rigged. Apparently they were just throwing punches. The boxer was making comebacks left and right. His opponents couldn’t get a punch line in. The boxing referee kept breaking up the fighters. He said no punch lines allowed. The boxer kept fighting dirty. He was determined to hit …
Shrek Puns 1. What do you call a sad onion? A shreking onion! 2. Why was Shrek late to the party? He took the onion route. 3. What kind of music does Shrek like best? R&B-gre. 4. How does Shrek keep his swamp clean? With his trusty sham-wow! 5. Why does Shrek smell so bad? …
Seal Puns 1. What do you call a seal who likes to sing? A sea-lebrity! 2. Why don’t seals like to share their food? They’re shellfish! 3. Why did the seal cross the road? To get to the other tide! 4. What do you call a seal that roams the neighborhood? A seal of approval! …
Worm Puns (20) 1. What do you call a worm who loves music? A hum-worm! 2. Why didn’t the worm want to go to school? He was afraid it would be too taxing. 3. What do you call a psychic worm? A palm worm! 4. Why are worms so slow? They only have a little …
